You could destroy me with everything you know.
You could tear down my careful reputation
with the secrets I willingly told you.
You could set fire to the comfortable life I’m living,
and have the flames engulf me too.

I don’t think it was healthy,
to  tell you that much.
I don’t think I should have told you
every one of my  d r e a m s
s e c r e t s ,
and  w i s h e s .  

But what was I supposed to do?
Every sign pointed that we had something real.
You helped me plant a garden in the shade
(it failed)
We ate popsicles on my front step
(they ruined my shirt)
You went swimming with me in the creek
(we hadn’t meant to get wet.)

You teased me when I slipped,
We both shared awkward glances at my sister’s questions,
I tried to get dirt out of your hair-
-you know, every time I see hair like yours I freeze.
It could be anyone, any length, anywhere, and I still stop dead.

I think you’ve ruined me without even whispering a word.

You never cared to much about my words, actually.
You didn’t care for my poems or my songs,
not more than politeness needed.
Politeness is one of your main qualities,
And like most polite people,
Honesty is not one of them.

I don’t know how I told you everything about me,
and you still didn’t know that the hard truth
would have hurt me less than the uncertainty
we’re now dangling in.
If you had just told me the truth-
I would have been okay with it.
Do you understand that?

I would have been more than okay with the truth.

I know a lot of things.
I know that at night, the shadow of the door
on the roof,
can either look like Patrick Star,
or the grim reaper.
Take your pick.

I also know that if you’re loud enough,
you can be quiet enough when you disappear,
and no one knows where you are.
Or maybe they’re so annoyed with you,
that they don’t care.

I know that if you look in the mirror too long,
you'll find yourself turning from side-to-side,
rating every part of your body out of ten,
and you will find that you
hardly ever get higher than a seven.

I know that if you bury yourself
deep enough in something,
the rest of the world will hurt less.
But a forewarning-
This doesn’t always work,
sometimes it hurts more.

I know that if you have a good enough poker face,
Blackjack is actually pretty easy
(when you aren't playing against your father).
And I also know that poker faces
are more important than you might think.

I know that if your throat gets a lump,
you can swallow it down,
but once your nose starts to tingle,
9 times out of 10, you’re going to cry,
and you won't look pretty while you do it.

I know that if you close your eyes,
you can wish away a lot of things,
and make up a lot of things,
but when you open your eyes,
your wishes didn’t come true,
and your dreams aren’t real.

I know if you give someone a part of yourself,
and they leave you,
you’ll spend the rest of your life
trying to get it back
but you never will.

I know a lot of things.