I seat in dread,
It's the corpses,
It's the tension,
And foul stench.

The way the blood drips,
Gently onto my skin,
From my head,
I'm sleepy though.

I want to rest,
I'm convinced,
I need it,
But lately I've been too convinced.

And trouble follows,
It's attracted to me,
It loves my impulses,
My irrational decisions.

That dance with danger,
With no care in the world,
Just pure self indulgence,
They love my destructive self.
By:Jn

Yes,
We are back here again,
And yet,
It's worse.

I'm becoming more cold,
Less caring,
And more numb,
I knew it.

So it's easy,
And yet I don't hate it,
I'm just surprised,
About how it's always like this.

Then again,
It's not bad,
Living on the edge,
And trying to balance things out.

And yet,
If it tips,
I'm gone,
I love the risk.

Maybe love,
Isn't for me,
It's for me to give,
Even when I don't get it.

Maybe love,
For me is a distant dream,
Due to control,
Due to me being impartial with myself.
By:Jn

Colour me impressed,
I'm stuck,
I've been lured in,
You've got my attention.

I'm hooked,
To your embrace,
That soft voice,
That calls to me.

Colour me surprised,
The way you change,
The way you sway me,
The way your body controls me.

Your scent,
Takes me places,
I can still smell you,
On my body.

Colour me entrapped,
Even when you say it's not your design,
That there isn't a plan,
That it's natural.

That's worse,
But she doesn't seem to realise that,
She doesn't know she's poisonous,
And it's addictive.

I've let her in,
Into my crazy world,
She's now a bad girl,
And it's tempting me to be bad too.
By:Jn

It's a slip really,
But nonetheless,
It's a mistake,
The world works like that apparently.

It's the way she looks at me,
It has me hesitating,
I know I want her,
And yet I'm scared to hurt her.

Love has a way,
Of being painfully sweet sometimes,
Like a melody,
Carrying nostalgia.

It's a situation,
We both brought to ourselves,
She knew what she was doing,
And so did I.

It's the way,
She finds herself in my mind,
Even when,
I'm trying to forget about her.

In this situation,
I'm in love with her,
I want to hold her close,
I don't want her slipping away.

I want her feeling the same,
And yet I can't tell,
She's good at giving me a hard time,
She's good at confusing my mind.

She snack in,
I let her through,
Inadvertently,
Into my safe spot.

Not sure she knows that,
Not sure I want her too,
I just want her around,
I want to spend time with her.

I'm in a situation,
My mind's in conflict,
It's her again,
She wants to come in.

The doors open,
For her,
It always is,
At anytime.

I'm in a bind,
I want all of her,
I want all her moments,
But I'm not sure she wants the same.
By:Jn

They say,
They talk,
Apparently,
We are in love.

I'm happy,
But it's questioning,
Due to the situation,
Due to my thoughts.

I love the idea,
Of you and I,
Happening,
Of you and me existing.

But some part of me,
Doesn't want that,
It's not a "you" problem,
It's a "me" one.

I want your love,
Your attention,
I want all of you,
Infinitely.

Yet it's the silence,
It's captivating,
I'm in love,
With both you and it.

I know,
My heart wants you,
Just as much as,
The silence.

And yet,
Here we are,
Friends,
In between all this love.

I could swear,
But I can't,
It'd be a lie,
A beautiful one.

I love you,
That is true,
But,
The idea is poisonous.

Not being,
Able to tell you,
Kills me,
And yet I'm addicted.

Maybe,
Me loving you,
Is enough,
Maybe this illusion has me caught.

I'm stuck in a what if,
Of you and I,
It's a beautiful lie,
I find myself revisiting.
By:Jn