trying to remember where I'm heading
but the past pulls me back in every time
i'm drowning in nostalgia and unanswered questions
the faded ceilings tell my story
but i can't write the ending in time
and ends, always incoming

i can dream or wake up if i choose
the chipping paint reveals the past
silence witness to the years gone by way too fast
and as it crumbles memories flash
the echo's fill a room so vast
nostalgic pauses
pretend the present isn't waiting

our best days are gone
but their echoes still persist
long lost melodies
wrapped in thick layers of mist
as I gaze at my childhood ceiling
where my innocence used to reside
i realize
time moves on , no matter how hard we hide

what a price to pay
for a life
it chips away
and inward we go
the mental strain
splits infinity
breaks me

enjoy
that last sunny day
felt the last of their warmth
at nightfall
the chill comes in
the trees prepare for winters sleep
heavy silence of frozen mornings
a peace unfitting
amidst a world of chaos
but, enjoy

the first day is always the hardest
the sun shines
but i'm blind to it
a coronation but no ones invited
heads down
but not proud if it
the morning papers only filled with sadness
we rifle through it like nothings the matter
internal thinking causing external issues
solve them
or they will harm them

sometimes i catch myself in the mirror and stare
just.
stare.
i don't stare long
but its an uncomfortable amount of time
i look into my eyes
but nothing looks back
i look around my face
what you look at every day
the best presentation of myself
in physical form
this, auto pilot