i found Him 'neath rhododendron bush in sheltered, dark enclave
i found Him in the verdant field that swallowed crimson sun
i found Him once on top of fell overlooking veiled concave
i found Him all by myself in place where walketh no one

i whispered words of no-thing-ness, timeless and eternal,
i captured time in a flask upon those pastures vernal,
and when i'm decrepit, dried-out leaf, tired of ties fraternal,
i hold that flask to my lips and drink elixir immortal.

they lie on my couch and reminisce
and call to mind what's amiss
i feed them with ideas of light
that turns their thoughts sunshine bright

and whilst it's them i try to heal
it's really me that's beginning to feel
life's manageable, there's a way out,
action speaks loud and it's got clout

so when you're feeling down in the dumps
from life's travails, its humps and bumps,
when you're in receipt of dark deceit
of sorrows that turn to bitter the sweet

helping others is a way to trump
the things that make your heart go thump
it's a therapy like no other
the help you give to one another.

when blood is cheap
is it time to weep?

when animals matter more
is it time to keep score?

when police abuse
do we watch more news?

as rivers run purple with human blood
earth saturated with pain
skies run scarlet as lava flood
sweeps life 'n limb down the drain

Covid and war
who's keeping score?
what will come next?
send me a text

I see another and think i'm better,
tying my ankles with shackle and fetter,
the pride vile not allowing advance,
for fear of someone looking askance

at what i do, perhaps not perfect
enough to feed my self-respect
or rather my need to be correct
in eyes of the world, in extrospect

the chocolate in jar, the biscuit in tin,
i'm not free o' greed, or lustful sin,
constant hankering after the superfluous,
and hidden darkness i daren't discuss

and when i see a person succeeding
who in my eyes is exceeding
the heights i've reached or attained
it's envy to which i'm sorely chained

enveloped in physicality,
the gluttony that is in me,
venality and carnality
forgetting spirituality,

when awakens the righteous spark
wrath is stirred in seeing the dark
in others that me seduces
though mine own, i've plenty excuses

but sloth is my overriding guilt
that puts a stop to anything built
crowning me in crown of thorns
to decorate those devilish horns

to shrive i yearn, to be assoiled,
to rid me finally of the soiled
raiment of my spirit 'n soul,
to fly unhindered to my goal.

my sister opened wide the curtains
trust a woman to be the first
ever since linger uncertain
a tendency formed at birth

in private world to be submerged
but yearning for the limelight
frightened of the unrehearsed
perverse desire shine up bright

now i'm seeing the curtains closing
i've had my chance to light the night,
chosen to be self-enclosing,
'stead of straight to shout what's right.

if i had a chance, would i do it better,
would i find the path of strength,
speak up clear without a fretter
walk the path of untold length?

now i find i'm losing hold,
head submerging in the water,
soon to lie in bed of cold,
world apart, universe un autre.

Try to paint in words
The experience of G-d's Presence

Hear His whisper
In your mind
Iridescent shining rainbows

Warmth and love
Where self has no place

You have the choice
To draw near
To disappear

And who can say no

i write with faltering pen, no wisdom,
dip my nib in tears and blood
write in anguish and despair
as floundering ship not knowing where

it's headed in waters turbulent 'n rough
frothing, a storm unseen foretold
gnashing teeth of sharks rebuff
surrounding, grinning, as friends of old

blinded youth with no insight
stumble aimless in the dark
mistaking mirage for real light
shark's teeth for lighthouse spark

the ship has lost its rudder
there's no wheel at the helm
at the slightest shudder
the sea'll overwhelm

the sailors with the people
who've forgotten how to swim
paid no thought to the ripple
now the outlook's grim

i'm not so concerned of their survival,
they'll weather out this storm,
it's just that soon may come a tidal
wave, bubble bursting, losing form

in a moment, all is lost,
with no vision, ship is tossed
as a match, save Grace's Hand
lead them back to soul and land.

to You my heart thirsts
cry in me bursts
but eyes are weak, face pallid,
no longer worth, no longer valid

how long will i sit in the darkness,
lost in haze of howling hyena,
my soul is naked, hates the starkness
of physicality, of sin's arena.

in sigh heart's immersed
as bereav'd mourns her first
to You my heart thirsts
my cry in me bursts,

i'm sinking in quagmire
arms are weak,
lost their fire,
one thing still desire.

You.

In the shadowed streets that sigh
Under burden of human cry,
From the troubled hearts that weep,
As secrets silent sleep.

There flows a river where flowers bloom
On banks of gold and verdant plume,
Where zaftig earth finds its voice,
In nature's sweet rejoice.

And as the dawn in crimson hue,
Breaks on world refreshed anew,
Sun of hope and prayer true
Sparkles silver yon pavements' dew.

sleep, my child,
drift upon the ether
in gentle mother's smile
as you rest beneath her

sleep, my child,
for there will come a day
when forces far from mild
will come out war to play

when the vicious and the terror
will tear each other apart
leaving nothing but a pallbearer
and a broken heart

till that day, my child, sleep
revel in your youth
dance among the woodbines' creep
the leaves of jagged tooth

amongst the mosses of spring and elves
sleep, my child, sleep,
for men will ever corrupt themselves
as the humble weep

and till the day when evil implodes
when all that's good survives
skip along the sleepy roads
where butterflies lead good lives

hide beneath the buttercup
for its shelter is more true
than all the falseness that's blown up
in world that waits for you

Life recedes, unbidden,
into the shadow,
depths, dark and hidden,
start of embryo

the earth is breathing
suppressed desire,
the enigma of living
the hidden fire

a smile is the crack that lets the sunshine through,
it shines for others and it'll shine back at you
so however you're feeling, let that sunshine through
it'll make you feel better, fresh and sleek and new.

in a crevice of the earth
beats a heart
like a newborn babe at birth
at the start
as new life emits a gurgle
and a cry
prepares to jump the hurdle
or to die

so the snowdrop lifts its sleepy head
from beneath its snowy spread
a revival from the dead
at the edge of flower-bed

its flash of white
like moon in night
augurs sight
of colours bright

as Artist starts anew
His canvas set and true
no imprecise slapdash
or impotence 'n backlash

for here He blends true harmony
the plant, the flower, the bird, the tree,
and all combine and music sing
in herald of [the] season spring.

how do some people
manage with ease
to move in crowds
to do as they please

while others frightened in their skin
timid as rabbits, nerves paper-thin,
socially uneasy, inept and clumsy,
not knowing to smile or maybe curtsy.

how do some people manage it
smile and comment lickety-split
while i, as fetal, curled misfit,
cringe in a corner, waiting to quit.

but perhaps if i their magic had
could mingle 'n linger, take the good and the bad,
i'd be unable to lift up a finger
to write, to muse, as ******* binger.

those nerves that are taut are highly tuned
they feel the sun and they feel the wound
i would not have it any other way
rather inept be with spirit bouquet.

****** softness,
Angelic colour,
Gentle to taunt us
Queen of Summer.

Still she rises
Golden wonder,
Shows her prizes
Makes me younger.

Pink's too ordinary,
It's more lavender,
Heaven's emissary,
Beauty's avatar.

Aroma intoxic,
Sweetest optic,
First Rose in Spring,
Thou art everything.

life circles the drain
with every breath
chaff with the grain
approaches death

what oaf am i
when death is nigh
to waste the time
on poetry rhyme

Shadow and aura
They're always there
whether in Torah
whether in prayer

occasionally the light
shines strong and bright
but oft times despair
spreads its black air

most times they're both
fighting for troth
the sacred oath
stifled by growth

of shameful shadow
that blots out the sun
that blots out the marrow
of what's to be done

laziness thy name is known
thief of time, turns fire to stone,
you think you own me but this I own
that my true love is G-d alone.

shadow and aura
they're always there
whether in Torah
whether in prayer

occasionally the light
shines strong and bright
but oft times despair
spreads its black air

but most times they're both
fighting for troth
the sacred oath
stifled by growth

of shameful shadow
that blots out the sun
that blots out the marrow
of what's to be done

laziness thy name is known
thief of time, turns fire to stone,
you think you own me but this I own
that my true love is G-d alone.

He bent over
The shadow in grey
Kissed the lips
Of life away

Eyes, closed buds,
Ne'er more to open,
Veins of blood
Weary and broken.

Spirit released
From skeletal prison,
Body deceased,
Soul arisen.

Flowers of light,
Music immortal,
Embrace a child
Unto God's portal.

Secular hustle of city streets,
neons cozen the weary,
flicker with promise, eternal nights,
fleeting moments to wake the dreary.

but 'neath the surface, there's no converse,
only echoes, leitmotif of isolation,
lost in labyrinth of sweet sensation,
loss of life in soul stagnation.

tongue sharpened
deadly instrument
****** into the heart,

world is darkened
soul laments
the world it falls apart.

but 'neath the hardened
heart of insolence
there's a secret smart,

silent sobbing
a soul that's throbbing
longing for new start

look beyond
the painful jibe
the knifing diatribe

look into
his hurting heart
G-d's true work of art

we're no better
or no worse
at core we're all the same

a holy letter
or hallowed verse
of G-d's unspoken Name.

i find delight in the spider
he of long and spindly leg
that floats in air as a glider
affixed to silken string o' web

concentric circles in straight line
affixed with spokes from hub
dripping glue of deadly shine
to catch the flying grub

in centrepoint, without a breath,
he sits with pincers poised,
ready to deal blow of death
in lethal void of noise

with patience, as ship in berth,
he waits, with glee 'n mirth
sits very still, grin suppressed,
to welcome unwary guest

the slightest tremour from his trap
sends him racing to his food
in cocoon with zap and snap,
mummifies unfortunate dude

and when he's ****** out last saliva
of life and meaning from his caller
he retracts as deep-sea diver
to the depths of fatal mauler

there to bide his time again
until the next crashing plane,
insect flies into his den
and 🕷 smiles and nods, 'amen'.

walk, he said, on tiptoe,
make sure your voice unheard,
leave the body far below,
the soul with wings of bird

fly to place untouched
soft, he said, with tenure,
each space with mind enclutch
spirit on soul adventure

meld unto the substance
step by step the climb
head bent in allegiance
in place that's void of time

there was fanfare when she came
golden suns whisper'd acclaim
the robin had awoken
and the squirrel from her heim

ladies swirl in pinks and white
leaves unfurl to petals bright
there is music in the air
spring's arrival all declare

"stand up straight!" she said,
"do not slump!" she cried,
i couldn't less have cared
for all she tried and tried

but now i understand
those well-meant words of wisdom
for if you stand up grand
you'll feel a king - not victim

this world will throw you curveballs,
and people are not angels,
so stand as if you've strong walls
within those gentle facials

your meekness keep within
before your own Creator
and smile at friend and kin
be not fazed by your hater

this world's no ballet arena
for a prima ballerina
it's a place of spiritual warfare
so stand strong and don't despair

to win the inner battle
you have got to be strong
a smile and seeming chuckle
will ease the way along

so while you're working on inner calibre,
don't forget that outer pose,
it'll help unsheathe your inner excalibur
if you garnish your self-repose

Diamond-studded, velvet black,
skies invite eyes to search
to wonder at the planets' track
angels on their perch

Endless their revolution
no false step or fall
perfection in execution
Of their Master's call

the stars on high stand forever
testimony to their Creator
the amicable Restaurateur,
Inventor, Innovator

"He'd never annex Crimea," said political analysts.
Until the day he did.
"War in the Donbas? Never!" opined the seasoned journalists.
Then there was. Just because.
"He'd never do it to Ukraine,"
said geriatrics sans a brain.
Then flushed their opinion down the drain
Three times burnt,
You'd think they'd learnt
The word 'never' doesn't apply
to the Kremlin's mighty guy
Yet, "He'd never press the button!"
Mouth politicians over their mutton.
While world watches, eyes incredulous
West End movie in slow-motion
As the Monster, persistent, sedulous,
void of feeling and emotion,
presses button, rings the death-knell,
smiles as east and west do flounder
pulls the rope, rings the death-bell
on humanity to fall and founder
to burn in fire with their hater
the world a crisp on incinerator.

loathsome stink,
the stench of mundane,
suffocates spark.
the pull of body,
fingers the neck and squeezes.

soul splutters,
spirit flounders,
hope is all but lost.

Yet whisper laughter,
and light flickers,
in moment, eternity,
life into shadow.

Then it passes.
corpse lies still,
as spirit lives on
in choice of host.