i feel like dying
literally
and ted I don’t mean figuratively
because it’s true
i want to *****
i want to cry
i want to plead
“please why?”
if I were to describe that dream
that’s a beautiful monster
beautiful yet horrifying
happy yet destructive
i feel for a moment
that i'm complete, whole
for a weird reason
i want to drink lots of water
i feel dehydrated inside
and at the same time
drown this feeling down
like a child
who doesn’t know how to swim
**** him gasping for air
shouting
“help
help me
i don’t want to die like this”
but I will say
“i want you to die like that
because i'm thirsty
and I want you to die”
im just hoping
that the kid’s death
will not eventually
**** me in the long run
because I felt that it will