Everything felt like a competition
I felt like I was not appreciated
I gave up on having your attention
Cause maybe to you I didn't matter
To you I should've pushed harder
I should've been much better
I lived life knowing I was not enough
Always know that I will never be
Cause at the end of the day
You'd point out somebody else
And you would always say
That person is far better than me

Memories
Distant
Like the horizon
Stretched out in the open sea
Where the sun rises and falls
Paint the skies
And color my eyes

Last night
You had a bottle of liquor in your hand
And you can barely stand
From all the feelings you have for him
They were pulling you to the ground
Today you wake up
But the pain still lingers
And his words taste bitter in your mouth
You hate it when you're sober
Because that's when it hits you harder
Yes, it's over
But you still have a bottle of liquor in your hand
Will you have another?

Denial.
Slips like smooth ice
Into a delicate mind
Freezes over the wound
Numbs the pain
Til it's only dull and
You can forget
Everything that hurts,
Just for a moment
Let's play pretend
Paint a freezeframe
Of grey emotions
It feels better than
Red and blue.