My mouth is stretched into a parody of a smile
As I look into the mirror
I swallow down the rising bile
Try to make my vision clearer
I wipe the tears off my face
As I contemplate
Which choice would hold more grace?
I try not to deteriorate
I tell myself it’s okay
You don’t have to worry anymore
You can lock yourself away
Deep within your core
I try to still my mind
And look around for the last time
To this place that I will never again find
This enigmatic pantomime
Finally I close my eyes
And when they open I’m gone
My real self dies
And my conscious soul is withdrawn
This is kind of basically being physically present but absent in all other aspects