Laying in bed, i’m counting the speckles on the ceiling, along with all the ways in which I lost her. There once was a time where I use to count the freckles on her body instead; ear, nose, neck, chest, even down to the little speckle in her one eye. They were my favorite thing about her, because they were one of the only things that managed to stay the same, while she was changing like Winter to Spring.
From hello, to lets go out, to I love you, to this is getting hard to handle, to I slept with somebody else, to good bye- I counted them as she walked away for the final time, all accounted for; the only things from the start that still remain.

I think I understand why they call them beauty marks now.

1 AM, I sit here

Slice myself open, rip my heart out, and let raw feelings bleed out on to a piece of paper

1 AM, you lay there

Inhaling another, exhaling love, intertwining souls.

2 AM, you’re closing your eyes

Good night, I love you- you whisper, as you kiss her on the cheek, and roll over for the night.

2 AM, I’m closing mine

I never understood how vacant could be an emotion until tonight. Good night, I love you- I whisper, as I close my eyes, and feel my soul slip away.

little devil,
when will you leave me?

consume me,
fully.

eat me entirely.

*I don't want to suffer anymore.