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1.8k · May 2019
Why
Alaska Young May 2019
Why
Why do you push people away?

"I want them to be happy."
913 · Apr 2017
Toughness
Alaska Young Apr 2017
"You're tough", she said.
And I thought.
Am I tough because I really am
Or I'm tough because I've got no choice but to be one?
I hope I'm the former.
774 · May 2017
I Meet the Dead End
Alaska Young May 2017
I turn my back
Without glaring
Heartbroken
Half-crying
Knowing that I will never be called back.
It's painful.
But I know it's the right thing to do.
I meet the end.
The finish line of madness.
I hope I wouldn't meet you again halfway.
Thank you.
592 · Jul 2019
don't look at me that way
Alaska Young Jul 2019
your drunken eyes
keep telling me
a different story
468 · Jul 2019
what if vs. why does
Alaska Young Jul 2019
which weighs heavier?
the regrets of what did not happen
or
the memories of what had happened
457 · Sep 2019
Adult-View of Life
Alaska Young Sep 2019
life is a never ending series of
"I'll figure it out."
444 · Apr 2017
Why Write?
Alaska Young Apr 2017
Because people ruin trust
and papers don't.
416 · Jun 2019
Go on, girl
Alaska Young Jun 2019
People die
              and feelings change

       Feelings die
              and people change

                    but from the start,
                                              in between,
                                                           and in the end....
                                                                                                  life always,
                                                                                          always goes on..
and so do you.
385 · May 2019
A little less
Alaska Young May 2019
Everyone wanted to be happy.

Me, I just want to be a little less sad.
Alaska Young Mar 2017
Read between it.
No answer lies.
Not even a hint could survive.
Madness.
Hit the dead end.
Comfort yourself.
Pain is part of the game.
And you can never win.
Acceptance.
Not even acceptable.
Insanity.
I could wait.
Forever if you want.
Even I hate waiting.
Even if you don't come.
I'll still wait.
For the nth time.
Madness and insanity.
Both at once.
Because when it comes to you,
everything happens at once.
Like being danger and being saved.
Like my favorite almost and my biggest what if.
Like living and dying.
Like loving and hating.
And between those paradoxes,
is a thin line
A thin line that sets the limit.
A stop.
A big NO in my world of yeses.
A boundary in what I thought is a never ending madness.
A wake up call.
And the thin line tries so hard to limit my madness.
But it cannot contain my insanity.
It overflows.
Like diffusion.
So passive that it didn't require any aid to flow.
Like it destined to spill and divulge everything I hid.
315 · Jul 2019
slowly
Alaska Young Jul 2019
i'm slowly learning that most people
want only my attention
not my heart

i
guess
it was too hard to handle
307 · Jan 2019
Untitled
Alaska Young Jan 2019
why do we become so much of what we're afraid to be?
305 · Jun 2017
Her Horcrux
Alaska Young Jun 2017
I love your stories.
Happy. Sad. Confusing.
Secrets. Fairy tales. Tell-all.
Drunk or not.
Truth or lies.
I don't care.
I love hearing your stories.
I love looking into your eyes and sees the fire slowly burning.
With a flame that ignites the moment your mouth started to utter.
I love how you look for my gasps when your words fall.
I love hearing your stories.
It's like being your horcrux.
Like some part of your soul is hidden on me.
Dark maybe, but something treasured.

-E.T.E-
Feel free to tell me everything. I'm more than be willing to listen.
265 · May 2019
save me
Alaska Young May 2019
save me
from my thoughts

save me
from my demons

save me
from these pains

but most of all,

save me from you
249 · May 2019
.
Alaska Young May 2019
.
I wanna hear you saying
"I love you"
But when you utter the word
I heard
"I'm sorry".
248 · May 14
mirrored
Alaska Young May 14
I hope you don't hate
the reflection you see
when u look in the mirror
240 · Oct 2019
Untitled
Alaska Young Oct 2019
i wish
"sorry"
can make
the pain
stops
210 · Mar 2017
Before After
Alaska Young Mar 2017
Before the sun sets on west
Before it rises again on somewhere’s east
Before the dusk and dawn came
I want to hear you again calling my name
Before the words of goodbye fall
Before the parting demand its toll
Before we reach the finish line
I want to ask, have you ever been mine?

And after all the before has been done
After all the memories had gone
After the ending had finally come
I want to tell myself hey lady you’ve got this one.
205 · Apr 2017
Faking It
Alaska Young Apr 2017
They asked me who's the lucky guy.
And I faked a nearly broken laugh.
#FakenessIsReal
205 · Apr 2017
How To Fall Out of Love?
Alaska Young Apr 2017
Instead of going with the flow,
why not stop the flow?
Instead of letting it grow,
why not let go?
Instead of drowning in to your feelings,
why not swim out of it?
And most of all,
instead of dreaming,
why not wake up?
Face the reality
Stop the false hopes
Forget the half-wishes
And save your yourself.
That's how I fell out of love.
192 · Sep 2017
The End Begins Here
Alaska Young Sep 2017
This is it.
The final end.
The finish line.
The destination.
Call it whatever you want.
But this is it.
This is where the ending begins.
This is when I decided to stop.
I don't wanna fool myself again.
This time this is real.
It'll be a slow fade.
No traces of pain.
No amount of rancor.
No turning back.
I will end it here.
Here, where I became happy.
Where I learn how to look forward on mornings.
Where you told me all those pretty lies.
And where I was fooled to believe
It was a great stay here.
magical to be honest
But pretty lies are for kids who believe on fairy tales
on prince and princess
on happily ever after
And I realized I'm all grown-up.
Old enough for bedtime stories and fairy tales.
I know ours wasn't an enchanted one
No fairy godmothers who will grant my wishes
No frogs that will turn into prince
No knight in shining armor who'll save me

We don't exist in reality.
And I lived happily never after.
191 · Apr 2017
Awakening
Alaska Young Apr 2017
We gave up
knowing that no amount of courage
will win the fight  we're fighting
We gave up
not because we're  coward
but because we are brave enough to let go of what we're fighting for the longest time
And then we realize
we don't have to fight for somebody
who don't even know the war we're facing.
#bravery
186 · Aug 2019
i lost me
Alaska Young Aug 2019
i lost count of sheep
on waiting for you to tell me something
i want to hear

i lost track of time
on waiting for you to catch me
in this falling game

but above all

i lost myself
trying to be someone
you want me to be
182 · May 2019
Writing
Alaska Young May 2019
Perhaps that's the thing about writing
It demands sadness.
180 · Apr 2017
Eyes Don't Lie
Alaska Young Apr 2017
I hate when people  look me in the eyes
I'm afraid
they might know the truth.
#truth
178 · Jul 2019
unspoken
Alaska Young Jul 2019
i hope the things we never speak of
aren't the same things we'll regret someday
174 · May 2017
Gravity
Alaska Young May 2017
They say gravity is the sole responsible for everything that falls
But I guess, gravity has nothing to do with
falling in love
Because when I fall for you
You don't pull me towards you
No force was exerted to draw me closer
I willingly fall
I let myself break
I let myself get hurt
Perhaps you're more than gravity.
174 · Apr 2017
Memories
Alaska Young Apr 2017
(noun)
-a place in the past where falling inlove is just as easy as obeying gravity and heartache was never a choice.
#memories
174 · Apr 2017
Dear Abe,
Alaska Young Apr 2017
You left me hanging on a cliff where in any second
I will fall and break
together with my false hopes and half-wishes I made for both of us.
P.S.
Truth already slapped me, hard actually.
Please comfort me with a lie.

Always,
A
165 · May 2017
Dear You
Alaska Young May 2017
My thoughts were corrupted and all I can sense were the inkling of some vividly fresh memories I kept from the days I've known you. These fresh memories that reminds me that somehow for the first time in the longest time I could actually fall in love into someone. I can feel the butterflies flutter in my stomach. I can managed a flirty gasps when your message popped up. I can feel the reddening of my ear when your name resounds somewhere else. It's a good beginning for a fresh love. Isn't it?
But darling, I choose to end this beginning sooner than I thought. I didn't want to, I HAVE TO. This madness I think is too beautiful that it should end up sooner than it begins. Sooner before I drown myself on my own-self made pool. As they say, all good things must come to an end. It's just ours ended sooner than I expected. Better than I expected, I guessed. This is the end and I can't still figure it out if it ended too tragic or too beautiful. I hope it's the latter. Dear, I want you to know that it was never my intent to fall as much as getting hurt. I was lured by false hopes and forget that possibility don't exist in a world like ours. But don't worry I'm on my way to renounce all the love I have for you. Again, I didn't want to, I HAVE TO. It's for myself. For me to begin again. Half-hoping that I will never meet you again halfway. If I do I might trip off again and fall. So please honey, I'm letting you go now hoping that this is the best for both of us. And if we will meet again at some point, I'm begging you choose the other way. The way that will lead you somewhere else, not on me. I guess I have the right on that favor knowing that I do the sacrifice now. At least do me that favor. Thank you. I know you will. And if someday time permits me to tell all this, I will be brave enough to tell you that yes, I do fall in love with you in the shortest span of time.

Always,
Potato
162 · May 2017
How to fix a broken trust?
161 · Jun 2019
Untitled
Alaska Young Jun 2019
can you make this one loud?

let's learn to listen with understanding
not to prepare for our replies
160 · May 2017
Don't.
Alaska Young May 2017
You broke my heart
and asked me if I'm fine?
How dare you!
156 · Jul 2017
Stars, Flowers and Rain
Alaska Young Jul 2017
We could have been.
We could be the most beautiful collision.
But we are stars from different galaxies.
We don't collide.
We are flowers.
Wild and beautiful.
We are virga rain.
But some flowers are not meant to bloom.
And some rain are not meant to fall.
Our infinities are limited.
And some love are unrequited.
#akire
144 · Jun 2019
Hit and Bounce
Alaska Young Jun 2019
The harder you hit the bottom,
the higher you can bounce.
142 · Apr 2017
The Trouble
Alaska Young Apr 2017
Loving someone incapable of loving you back
is better
than loving someone who can love
but won't ever love you.
Better not love at all.
I'm falling.
140 · Aug 2019
the first
Alaska Young Aug 2019
no one warns us
on the amount of pain
we'll endure for the first heartbreak

it'll either be
too much
or
too less

and in between is getting worse everyday
Alaska Young Apr 2017
I'm a willing prey
You can devour anytime
I'm weak and old in love
I got dazzled by glittering promise of it
I'm nowhere
You can easily find
But I'm afraid
Behind my weakness and willingness to give out love were somethings I couldn't keep.
I'm chaotic
A storm a teacup can't contain
A willing prey that prosaic predator won't catch
I'm difficult.
Odd.
Peculiar.
And only peculiar of my same will understood me
People like you won't like the way I think
Perhaps you wouldn't want to know what I'm thinking
I'm telling you if you're going to love me, then prepare yourself to a nightmare
For I'm a collection of it
Of dismantled almost
Of misunderstood histories
Of odds and ends
And on all of those is where my demons hide.
133 · Jun 2019
3 types of day
Alaska Young Jun 2019
Best days
Ok days
Worst days

Which day are you living on?
130 · Apr 2017
Rejection
Alaska Young Apr 2017
I've been a second choice for
twice, thrice, i don't know
I'm so used to it that I forgot how many times I became the last option.
129 · Sep 2019
hericane
Alaska Young Sep 2019
they say they will like you
until the storm within you starts stirring up
and blew them all away

and you were left alone
because
no one
no one
survived your storm
125 · Jun 2017
I'm Afraid
Alaska Young Jun 2017
If I'm gonna pray for you, I'm afraid you would not be given.
If I'm gonna take the risk, I'm afraid I will lose.
If I'm gonna be honest, I'm afraid I'll messed up.
If I'm gonna take the slightest courage of telling you about how I love everything about you, I'm afraid you'd hate me.
So I'm taking the step back.
I'm giving up.

We will end here.
And our story will never be told.
Just one request:
STOP giving me ******* reasons to hold on.
120 · Sep 2017
ANX
Alaska Young Sep 2017
ANX
I wanna scream so loud that no one will dare to listen on everything I had in my mind.
*******.
*******.
*******.
****.
114 · May 2019
PAIN
Alaska Young May 2019
it can either make you fearful or fearless

choose wisely.
110 · Nov 2019
what overthinking did
Alaska Young Nov 2019
you started it with a nick
and end it
with a twinge
but it's my overthinking that
tore it apart
and broke my own heart
105 · Jul 2017
We Decide to Die
Alaska Young Jul 2017
"What's keeping you sane?"
She asked.
And I looked to her with all honesty inside me
I replied.
"The same thing that keeps you crazy."
In three seconds, we die.
101 · Jul 2019
what i want to ask you
Alaska Young Jul 2019
why do you look at me
like i'm an easy thing to let go?
100 · Apr 2017
Not Your Everyday Queen
Alaska Young Apr 2017
I'm no princess
Not even a damsel in distress
I don't need saving.
Save yourself instead.
Be your own knight.
99 · Aug 2017
You're Beautiful
Alaska Young Aug 2017
words that water dead plants
Please stop.
94 · Aug 2017
Fuckworthy
Alaska Young Aug 2017
What do I learn in life so far?
Go, give **** with this one.

"don't throw ***** like confetti
choose only the fuckworthy ones"
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