sculpt me with your hands
your hands on my skin
your fingers in my hair
your knuckles caressing my cheek
build me with your words
your words are symphonies
your words make me whole
paint me with your kiss
your kiss covering my body
your kiss sending pleasure down my spine
draw me with your love
your love making me whole
your love moving my world
you are the artist
and I will be your masterpiece

Silent phone calls and broken promises
You beg me to speak
What am I supposed to say
There is nothing left for me here
A love too fast and too strong
It crumpled under itself
Like a deck of cards in the wind
I will get an apology from you
You say you are never coming back
I get a phone call an hour later
It is too late then
I have already learned how to live without you
I fill up parts of myself that you have left alone
I am not angry at you
Nor sad
I am hopeless
I am tired
Reminiscing has broken me down
Our future we built
Was nothing but a pretty text
Never in writing
You wanted someone who would grow up with you
You did not actually want me
You did not pursue me
Maybe I gave myself away too easy
But it is clear to me why so many people have left you now
You **** on your teeth so you don't yell
You beat your steering wheel
So your hands will not find my body
You should have curled your toes
Or bit your tongue
What you said cannot be pulled back in
We are past tense
One day you will return to me
For right now, I am the wind
And you are the beach I am blowing past
You needed me
I wanted you
You expect me to cry for your return
Saying "You do not care like you used to"
I force myself to cry
Crocodile tears

There is nothing for me in an empty room
But I keep coming back
Just to stand in it
To take in the four, beige walls
To lay on my back and gaze at the speckled ceiling
I tried to be as hollow as the room
To feel what it is like to be an exoskeleton of a human
How did you attempt to fill this room with boxes?
How did you attempt to fill those boxes with pieces of yourself?
I imagine this room with pictures and paintings
I imagine how it used to look, and feel, and smell
Telling myself that if I think hard enough,
You will be standing right in front of me
With your arms outstretched in a bear hug
I allowed my mind to drift to you
To remember
Just to remember
Just to try and find some clues and puzzle pieces
Just to figure out why you left.

I know what lost love looks like now
It's not a person in a rainy doorway
It's a ghost hovering in and consuming a space
It's the way footsteps echo in an empty hall
An empty hall you once stood in
It's finishing your favorite book for the first time
A book you obsessed over that now collects dust
It's spraying the last of a beautiful perfume
A scent that lingers on all of our belongings still
It's sitting in a room of silence with strangers
You stare in their faces and hope at least one lights up to see you
It's wearing my fingers to the bone when I hold a pencil
I keep writing apology letters that you will never see
It's the pale white walls of a doctors office
A boring and tired and uneasy place
No color rests upon its shoulders
No sound bounces off the walls
No scents take your back to memories
And you wonder why anyone even dares to make the puzzle pieces fit
It's only you
Your past lover
And your solitude

Your eyes
I would compare them to oceans
But that's not even the half of your eyes
They are creamier than my morning latte
They are richer than your morning espresso
The deepest part of your eyes
Is something I could dive into
And do flips in as if I was in a swimming pool
The color of your eyes
Is of tree bark in the summer
In the most lavish of forests
Your eyelashes are butterfly wings
They flutter softer than dandelions in the breeze
They curve up towards God himself
Their beauty is incomparable to your eyes
Because they are the frame for the most magnificent
Piece of art I've ever seen
It would be unfair to you because
Your eyes
Are more than oceans.

he brings the sun down
on its knees
the lions bow down when he walks by
he causes earthquakes on the cement
that rumble deep in my core
the trees loose their leaves for him
and the moon shines more brightly on his path
everything stops for him
then he looks at me
and my teeth clatter together in fear
and in awe

I beg the nerve endings in my brain
To pull out the sound of your voice
The way your tongue
Hit the roof of your mouth
When you said my name
I claw at my once smooth skin
To feel the graze of your hands
The way your fingertips
Ran over my unworthy being
I bite and chew at my lips
To taste the softness of yours
The way you were fragile
And made me feel whole
I keep trying to remember
Your presence in my body
But it's the same as an addict
Drinking water in a ***** bottle