"While he treats all women with respect, his woman gets special treatment. Why? Because she’s special and he needs her to understand that she is. That is the purpose he sees himself as serving: making her feel like the amazing, beautiful, incredible human being that she is."
___________________­____________________­__
"While she treats all men with respect, her man gets special treatment. Why? Because he’s special and she needs him to understand that he is. That is the purpose she sees herself as serving: making him feel like the amazing, handsome, incredible human being that he is."

I cannot give I'm broke
I do not have that's no joke
What you ask I cannot abode
Still payin on what is owed
I'm sorry I cannot comply
And do not wish for a harsh goodbye
But I cannot do what is asked of me
For I have nothing you see
So no matter how it is you put it
I have no money not even a little bit.

Ok so this my seem a bit obtrusive;
And I'm not being conclusive.
But I felt it since we first met.
Something I can't quite name yet,
This electrical magnetic force.
Should I let it take its course?
You bearly brushed against me,
I had to look just to see;
Was that a current that I felt?
From a simple touch, I thought I'd melt!
I wonder if you feel it as I do?
Should I take a chance on you?
Or place my hopes beneath the dirt,
Burry them so no one gets hurt?
For now though I'll just wait to see,
If you too have feelings for me.

I wish I could write happy things
I wish I had days where my heart sings
but I guess I'll have to accept what's true
and know my heart will always be blue
my kids make me smile sometimes
but I can't come up with happy rhymes
the tears they just fall down my cheek and my chin
and happiness it just does not win
I'm alone in this world I always will be
I just wish someone was here for me
but they're not and I accept it
it's not worth throwing the fit
why create drama when it doesn't have to be any
just love my happy days though there are not that many
maybe someday happiness will grow in my heart
and the joyfulness will play its part
but I have no faith for that to be
I only have faith in God you see
when my life finally does end
I'll get to meet my very best friend
he sits up there and watches me go through hell
watching every time that have fell
he picks me up and puts me on my feet
knowing one day we will get to meet
that day isnt soon enough for me though
but I have a patience that only he can know
so when I see him I'll smile my final forever smile
I'll be happy not having to fear for one more mile
he will make all bad go away
he will make my happiness stay
Now is the time to just wait
untill I meet him there at the pearly gate

I got no one to talk to and nothing to do
got a life full of sadness a life full of blue
I want to smile and I want to be happy
but my life is ****** just ******* ******
everyone sees my sadness but they don't care
when I need someone no one is there
alone in this world I shall always be
I just wish someone could love me for me
but that's a fairytale I know won't come true
so I'll just sit here alone thinking of you

When your best friend thinks that its okay to lie
does that mean I can jump off the roof and then I can fly
how absurd to think that I wouldn't know the truth of it all
how absurd to think that I would not fall
I don't understand lies over dumb ****
not like I'd have thrown a fit
I don't care what it is that you sexually do
it has nothing to do with me its all you
I'm not the kind of person that would want to see you alone
and lying is something I just don't condone
you hide behind fears that I won't be your friend
but don't you realize no matter what you do I'm there till the end
my heart hurts and now and its kind of your fault
though I still really love you by default
I just wish that you could understand
losing you as a friend is something not planned
so if you'd please stop with all your ******* tales
so my heart can stop its incessant whales
with you by my side as a friend should be
with you standing right here next to me
and know that I love you no matter what you do
you're my best friend I just want you to be you

I feel depression bubbling up from the deep
I try to keep avoiding thoughts that make me weep
I know this sadness is a battle I might not win
and that my happiness may end up in the trash bin
I just don't know what to do I'm alone and lost
fighting to stay happy and smiling at any cost
but I really feel like I'm running out of luck
so hoping my life doesn'tcontinue to mostly ****
laying here always in my empty bed forever thinking alone in my head
thoughts flooding my muddled mind the sadistic cruel depressing and absurd kind
times like this I really wish I had a friend knowing full well I'm going to be alone until the end
I just have to accept how things are going to be in my life
and know I'm never going to be a wife
Trying to be the best single mother of three
I know that's all any good parent could ask to be
but these tears hidden behind my eyes have yet to fall
because this depression hasn't yet fully came to call
so I guess I'm not going to start any fights I'm just going wish to you a many good nights

Depression eats my soul like a snail eats algae,
slowly consuming and withering it away with time.
I want to crawl into a hole and burry myself in it.
I don't want to talk to anyone for fear my depression will be as a virus and infect those I love.
So i hide myself away in my room all alone.
A fate I fear that will always be the end result in my life.
To always be lost and forever alone.

I run my fingers through my hair
sit down in an uncomfortable chair
jump up and run around
zip back on a rebound
trip on the rug and have a great fall
take a breath and scoot down the hall
fly through the bathroom door
and sit down once more
do the deed that needs to be done
then I'm up and on the run
Ive got things Ive got to do
sadly none of them involve you

Have you ever felt like the tiniest piece of ****,
on the smallest fleck of *****,
sneezed out by a disgusting snot filled nose,
which sits on the face of the nastiest,
disease filled being in the universe,
eaten by a cockroach,
devoured by a rat,
consumed by a cat,
digested by a dog,
and shat out again,
then picked up,
flushed down the toilet,
torn apart by a crocodile in the sewer,
only to be caught by a trapper,
Then made into a pair of boots,
that stomp through manure all day?

This is exasperating,
This rage I feel towards you.
I don't understand it.
I want it to leave,
But only intensifies in your presents.
I want you to leave.
But I'm kind,
I stuff my twitching fist in my pocket.
You have no respect.
You have no guile.
You have no remorse.
Your voice makes my fist twitch more.
I bite my tongue.
How much longer can I hold my composure?
Is there no cure for your crazy?
Can't you just shut the **** up n leave?
Why do I have to bite my tongue?
**** that *****,
I've had enough!
Get the hell out!
My fist twitches.
I turn and walk to the door
Out, I point!
You stair dumbfounded!
OUT! I yell and point again.
You stand gather your things and leave.
I sit back down and try to relax.
Man I hope that ***** never comes back,
EVER!
Finally my twitching fist n wriled nerves ease and release.
At last home is comphortable again.

I'm stuck in a rut
I don't know what to write
I'm stuck in a rut
I don't think I'm going to win this fight
I'm stuck in a rut
with nowhere to go
I'm stuck in a rut
and I just don't know
I'm stuck in a rut
no friends to help out
I'm stuck in a rut
but too proud to pout
I'm stuck in a rut
but I can't make me frown
I'm stuck in a rut
100 miles down
I'm stuck in a rut
just going to contemplate a while
I'm stuck in a rut
but you're just going to see my smile
I'm stuck in a rut
But guess what, I wrote
I'm unstuck from this rut
As I end this on a positive note

All night tears got my eyes swelled shut
Fuzzies stuck in the blood where I cut
I wanna say I hate but I don't
I wanna sleep all day but I won't
I wanna talk to you but I can't
Jus don't wanna hear u rant
Feel like I lost my best friend and the love of my life
How can one person deal with all this pain n strife
Feel like my life is in exile
But u won't c my pain only a smile.

I woke this morning with tears in my eyes.
I couldn't begin to tell you why.
my bed is empty my pillow is the best.
it out comphorts all the rest.
my chin is held high
but still I continue to cry
with no reason or rhyme as to why.

Put on your makeup maybe
Hold your chin up n fake it baby
Things won't always be this bad
Look at all the good times you've had
So hold that smile on your face
Some day things will fall into place.

I'm done completely not just for this minute
I've reached my emotional limit
I've been played far too long
You could have told me long ago I was wrong
Could have saved me a lot of pain
Wish I knew I had nothing to gain
Saw it coming but not so soon
Now I get to be here bawling like a loon
Not sure if it hurts more in my head or my heart
Never wished for us to ever b apart
But here I sit on this cold bathroom floor
Can't stop the tears as I block the door
Now I'm going to let this all sink in awhile
So I can keep my promise to show you only my smile.

For as much as I need too accept that you will never love me; so too do you need to accept that I will never stop loving you.

push on baby your stronger than this bs n can hold your head high cuz when you stand tall it's hard for people to look down on u even if you only stand 5"2.

Tired of the ignorance tired of the crap tired of the *******
it all makes me throw a fit.
Try n b the best u can n do for your friends
but **** it, why when everything ends .
Why put effort forth for anything when it isn't gunna go anywhere to begin with
true love n all that jazz is just a myth
so buck up baby n **** the rest
this is your life you only need to pass your own test

You keep trying to drag me into your depression
But you can't not even with all your repression
I've learned in life to hold my head high
N to those whom hurt you just say goodbye
My children deserve more than being tought to lie to me
N I find everything out you see
The lies n drugs n manipulation just arent my thing
Because with them my heart can't sing
So don't drag me into you web of *******
And you tried to so I had to quit
So I'm sorry I can hang with u no more
So as I leave you crying on the floor
Remember you did this to you
So take your own blame its the right thing to do

The word family has much more meaning than just marriage n blood relations . I have some blood relations I don't even consider my family because they don't act like family. I have people that have zero blood in common with me n I call them family. Family are those whom love you unconditionally. Those who will always b there to help even if they don't like y. Family are those who not only tell you they love you but those whom show it as well.

I have you  *******. As I fasten the wrist straps I kiss your palm, trailing them down your arm, to your shoulder, and on to your neck. Where i linger and nibble maybe just a bite too hard. I take your lobe between my teeth gently n let it slide away. smack! The whip bites your chest! Followed my hands reaching to caress the welts. Again followed by my lips Lavishing kisses n nibbles along your chest, lingering on the ******* to flick with my tongue. And down to your **** stomach. Crack! Another whip bites into your thigh. Again followed by my hands and sweet kisses. I place a hand on both your hips and trail my tongue the entire length of your shaft. Then along the sac line, as i reach around and lift you, down your ***. Taking both ***** into my mouth I massage them with my tongue. Slowly swallow the entirety of your ****. My mouth now resting at the base and circumference, I  swallow a few times to let my throat do the massaging. Then back to the head, with my lips, Where I flick my tongue over the v and take you in and out of my mouth simultaneously, Until your just about to explode. Then I use my hands to finish you as I like to watch the eruption. And finally climb on top and finish myself. falling beside you gleaming with sweat and heavy breathed we slip into a deep restful sleep.

The more growing that happens the more mature my love becomes.  Your love. I need to be a protector,  a protector for the love that you manifest into being. That which we are.
Time and the Ego are my only distractions. To say otherwise would be a "waste of time"  I miss You.
All of our moments together seem like dreams, dreams that come together and make a love story. One that is bright and true. Weird right? Good weird. The best. I'm grateful for our experiences together!

Time has torn us in different directions but when its right the wind will blow us back together and then well be the glue that will hold us together for all eternity we just have to grow first!

As I've walked this earth throughout the expanse of my existence, i have seen such beauty that has awed and bewildered my senses completely.
Then I met you!
I look back at those things i thought magnanimous; and they dull in comparison. The sheer epicness that your magnificent individual presents exudes; it astounds me. And no matter the lengths I go to try to put to  put to words the wondrous excitement that envelopes me when you r within view, I will never  be able to describe it fully enough in any world. There are no words that will ever come close.

Sitting  alone on the darkest of the nights
No stars are seen to make it bright
You feel a presence behind your back
Turn around but see no track
Standing up you start to pace
A cold wind blows across your face
Walking back and forth you fall
Come to find out your alone after all

what do you want me to say, what do you want me to do to prove to you that I'm sorry. I never ment to hurt you. it was the farthest thing from my mind, but I did, and I hate my self so much. I don't wish myself death. I want to wreathe in my hurt knowing I can't fix this **** up and your suffering for it. I want to peal all my flesh away and show you how much it hurts me for having been the source of all this anguish. I don't know how to deal with any of this.

I'm sorry I feel things.
I'm not inhuman.
I'm just a broken ****** up one.

Look into my eyes
You shall see truth
Look into my mind
You shall see reality
Look into my heart
See what you shall
I look into your eyes
I see pain
I look into your mind
I see confusion
I look into your heart
I see a hole
Let me ease your pain
Let me help when u need it
Let fill your heart
My eyes
My truth
My mind
My reality
I give them to you
My heart
Ahh yes
My heart
Well
You can have that too

HEY YOU!
I see faces in the dark!
There eyes glowing red.
An emence evil mark.
My heart has gone dead.
The numbness in my spine.
A chill in the air.
You soul has become mine.
Face it, life's not fair!
A once crossed path.
Head to head with my demons wrath.
Cry and beg for your life to turn around.
I can't hear your pitiful pleas, there is nothing, no sound.
Standing above you now hovering tall.
Turning around to detach your head,
Blood splats covering the once white walls.
.
.
.
Forget forgiveness!
.
.
.
You are already dead!
.
.
.
And I,
.
.
.
HA HA HA HA HA HA HA!
.
.
.
I WILL ALWAYS BE HERE.