i detest how she
belittles her freckles
when i see them as a galaxy
and i want to count every star
and watch every wish i make come true
as she laughs and calls me cute
because i lost count
when i looked up into her eyes
although i really just got lost

Please make love to me.

The words leave your lips
day after day
and i thank you
i honestly do.
But do you care about the galaxies
i store inside of this oh so
"****" body?
do you care
about my
hopes
dreams
ambitions
my emotions
inside my "pretty" little head?
because when you decided
to lower me
by counting how many boys
or girls
thought i was pretty
i screamed "stop"
and "you're making me uncomfortable"
you lashed out
and yelled
replying "what"
the word hitting me
straight in my chest
my oh so beautiful collar bones
and my "perfect" cleavage
and cracking something within me
and it took everything in me
not to explode into a million pieces.
Yes they think Im pretty
Yes they want to **** me
Yes i take it as a compliment
but is that * all i'm ******** worth

I only wrote your ending
Because.
It.
TEARS.
Me.
To.
SHREDS.
To think about your beginning.
I BECAME ACCUSTOMED TO YOU RIDING YOUR
OLD, BANGED UP BIKE ALONG THE STREET TO SEE ME EVERY MORNING AT 7:15 BECAUSE YOU WERE ALWAYS APPROXIMATELY 10 MINUTES LATE.
I WAS SO ******* HAPPY ALL THOSE DAYS WHEN WE SAT IN THE SLIVER OF SHADE TRYNG SO HARD TO STEAL JUST A TINY BIT OF PEACE!
I WAS HAPPIER THAT DAY YOU GAVE ME A BANDAID AND TOLD ME IT WOULD ******* BE OKAY WHEN WE BOTH KNEW MY WORLD WAS CRUMBLING AROUND ME.
and I never even told you a thing.
BUT YOU KNEW YOU ALWAYS KNEW!
YOU WERE ALWAYS A STEP AHEAD OF ME!
always knew me a little bit better than everyone else that I loved.
But thats the secret.
I took you for granted then.
I NEVER DID THAT AGAIN.
I HAVE NEVER IN MY LIFE BEEN MORE CONTENT THAN THE DAY MY HAIR WAS YELLOW AND I WAS A BOTTLE OF SUNSHINE AND
Y O U  WERE THE FROWN THAT POISONED MY PICTURE OF PERFECTION
and yet you smiled
you smiled for ME
you knew I was ******* happy and you smiled for me.
EVEN THOUGH YOU FELT LIKE ****
YOU  SMILED FOR ME
Y O U
SMILED
FOR
M E
Just to keep me happy.
and I loved you for that.
I love you for that.
I.
LOVED.
The way
YOU.
ALWAYS!
SMILED TO ME
I NEVER!
EVEN!
LEARNED
that you,
YOU OF ALL PEOPLE
had
a dark side until it
kissed me goodbye
on that late july day.
YOU WAVED ME GOODBYE
and I ******* COLLAPSED IN UTTER SHOCK.
because I never thought you would let her go
I NEVER THOUGHT YOU
YOU!
you would let ME go...
thinking about you makes
me cry sometimes
AND. I. HATE.  IT.
because for you, and for you alone
I
was
ALWAYS
strong.
YOU.
ONLY YOU.
taught
ME
to smile
and YOU
made ME
feel like
a bottle of sunshine
instead of a
rainy day in a glass

a thought of you is like an arrow,
it flies high but it hurts when it sinks in.

Where are you on this fine evening?
Are your eyes kissing the cross above your head ?
Or lingering on the warm dirt that fills the treads of your duct taped Converse hightops?
Are you somewhere in the middle?
Getting a taste of the foreign perspective
Of the sunset on our shared horizon
Who are you on this fine night?
A person fighting the great river?
Or a person who will swim in the current
Maybe you’re running along side with me
How far away are you on this everlasting morning?
Are you galaxies away looking for me across the universe?
Are you just a car ride away? In your house, in your room, sitting 3 feet off the ground, listening to quiet indie just like always
Or are are you just in Colarado

otm.