i want it dead, the wait, the ache
the breath i lose each time i wake
but the hope just rots and curls
and sinks beneath this ******* world

i want the "maybe" set on fire
the silence hung on razor wire
i want the dreams to come to life
the "someday" slaughtered with a knife

i want the future we won't hold
to freeze and crack and die in the cold
i don't want to play pretend
i want it dead. i want the end.

i don't want the wound that distance makes
the soul of us that daylight breaks
i don't want to play pretend
i want it dead. i want the end.

maybe the rain is the sky
trying to cry slow enough
for us to call it beautiful.

if it falls too fast,
we drown. it rises.
but sometimes
a light rain is all the sky can cry

the grey streches til it tears
it swells with what it wants to say
thunder never asks permission
it snaps.
cracks.
as if grief.
as if memory.
like sadness that's left
too quiet to scream

we stand under it anyway
our hoods behind the nape
palms to the sky
pretending it's just weather.