I overlooked so many people
For you
Yet
The answer was a no

I think
You don know
What I overcame
So it'll be a mystery
For you

Why everyone wants you
Obviously it's your choice in the end
But it doesn't hurt
To steal tiny glimpses

So I proposed
To myself
Lets go back
And apologize
To a few people
Who are kind of hurt
...

Well
I know what I'll do
In the next few weeks.

Happy birthday America!
You earn it
Being the best in everything
Being free for 237 years
Being the first colony to separate from Great Britain
Being the land of the free
Helping people worldwide
Winning two World Wars
Helping practice democracy
You are the best after all.
Good job and....
Enjoy your birthday

My heart twisted and turned
Convulsing erratically with acidic love

I love you too much
too much

head is filled with moments
i could and would
have done differently
greeted myself better

but that's the past
not to be confused with the present
I am similar to an
ever-loving-shy-boy
who you know
loves her

but is too scared to do anything
because he doesn't know how
and because he doesn't want to
hurt you

he just wants
to love faithfully
but
hahahah

faithfully.
from a teenager?!
what are we reading here?
science fiction?

but it is true
i **** at telling you
that my heart aches
at your thoughts
and when your name is uttered
tears me up

because i know
i did nothing to help
or did nothing to show my love

I just



let you sit there and cry
shame on me
for not doing anything
for ruining his moment
i cannot do much
to change the past
but i hope
that after you move
or I move

you will find someone better than me
I am not the best
cannot be
never was
I was just a re-incarnation
of my soul
who is very kind to people
and just as protective and shy
lies in my birth sign
Scorpio

Just never wanted to do anything
but love someone wholeheartedly
that's not something that will
happen so I need to let that fantasy go
but its a hard habit to break
when you are already knee deep into it

I open my laptop and type a few words
But they don’t fit even one bit
Tap, tap, tap, I delete the phrase
and I think as I sit how I **** at this ****

I can't find the letters that would work together
I try to say the things that I need to
but all that I write is as good as a broken kite
and I think as I sit how I **** at this ****

The lights glare around me and I try to focus on the screen
I lean on the soft sofa sitting so still
The words are just devils trying to **** they poke me with their horns and claws as they scratch me from hell
and I think as I sit how I **** at this ****

I spell out a rhyme and it just takes all my time
I might be my own worst critic but **** this **** is pathetic
the words are as bumpy and misshapen as guards
and I think as I sit how I **** at this ****

I work and work to no avail
I type a bit and then I stop and restart this cycle
click click click then delete, tat tat tat then delete, tap tap tap then delete and start over again
This is harder than making a dandelion turn into a roaring lion

I look around for advice and find someone to ask
I show my mom what I've written 'it's great' she responds
***** please I say nobody will be blown away
and I think as I sit how I **** at this ****

I focus on making the poetry about me
and some things come to mind and I begin to poke at the keyboard,
a blind man trying to make his way on a path
I look at what I've written and then I say aloud
aww **** its about a duck
and I think as I sit how I **** at this ****

Care for them
They are alive!!
They yearn for love
They yearn for your love

Give them water
Give them air
fresh air is considered best

And finally give them land
Loads of it

I am already sleepy
It's not even midnight
Lord Hypnos has already cast his spell on me
I am tired of staying awake
Can you forgive me?
That ways I can rest
*Peacefully

I let my friends cry
help them cry

depress them
everything but make them happy

i am a bad friend.

sigh.



I wish i changed some things
so i was better

See,
everyone is meant for someone
And people find them

But not me
Because i am just evil inside out
Knowing what needs to be done
But not acting on it
Knowing how it should be done
But failing at it

I am but evil inside and out

you know what?
You are not worthy of me

I feel myself compelled to like you
and provide you with happiness
but you decide to not like it

you decide to be yourself, secluded
and unloved from someone who actually desires you

Fine, it was your choice.
But remember forever. That I like, love you.

I dont know for how long.
But forever is the perfect choice for right now.

I fall in love with the sound of the rain as it hits my window pane
It comforts me as I lye in bed at night and reflect on all that is dead

I fall in love with you as the snow falls lightly, and embrace every moment that we spent together.

I fall in love with the crinkle in your noise
The one that slowly appears every time you smile that brilliant smile and laugh that wondrous laugh

I fall in love whilst talking to you,
The way you talk, laugh makes my day so much better!

I fall in love with the smile of a stranger on the street
When they give me a gentle beam as our eyes meet
In that moment I don't feel so lonely

I fall in love with the way you run
The rhythmic beating and the sweat,
They help me decode your personality from stranger to bff

I fall in love with the cool side of my pillow on a hot summers night
When my body is begging for relief from the summer heat and it thoughtfully accommodates my pleas

I fall in love with rhythmic waves from the ocean Poseidon sends us,
It gives me a reason to hug you when you get cold

I fall in love with the sunset, each time I lay my eyes on it
As the sun slowly sinks into horizon to create such a sublime image
My eyes always dazzled more and more each time

*My parts are in bold for easier identification.

nothing would change,
everything would go on
as usual
people would get back to their lives
would be little mourning

demons would have won

The good side of the world
would have lost a soldier
not that he was brave
but courageous
and
sacrificial
and
someone who would literally die
for you

Nothing would be lost

and life would resume
as though nothing ever happened.

His knuckles turned white
Yet he refused to let go
He is laughing with his inner soul
Yet no recognizes it

Is something the matter?
No...
Then why are you laughing like a madman?
Its laughter from the inner soul.. fool

OH MY
WE HAVE A FREE THINKER
JAIL HIM.
HE WILL BE A THREAT TO THE NATION
HE WILL BE OUR DOOM

*This is true. The people who tell us the truth, are called TERRORISTS or THREAT TO THE NATION just because they have the ability to tell the world what the government is actually doing, whatever happened to free speech...

Let me cry my tears out
Let me feel pain
Let me suffer
Why?
Because there aren't enough self-sacrificing
Let me offer myself as the sacrifice
I shall protect you
Do you not remember?
I told you that a while back

Just think of me
I will be there for you
I promise.

I refuse to hear
everything bad they tell about you
Yes, what they say is bad
It's unethical of them to do so
They don't even know you
They don't talk to you often.
Yet. They dare to speak evil of you
How mean indeed.

I never did like them
and talking like that of someone..

It is no doubt now
No wonder. Anything I do
or the people I like do
It turns evil.
Its just a matter of *time

I found out today
That I carry around chainmail
Similar to the Knights during The Middle Ages
But its more unreal
It protects me
And tells me not to spill my emotions
Similar to protecting the knight

It holds everything throughout the day
And at night
Everything within me crumbles.
I take off this "chainmail"
And i go into those dark alleys of my mind
Some with no escape
I try escaping with my plentiful books
They sometimes work

Other times its hell upon myself
My friends, and i regret it every time
But its a cycle I fail to stop
Unlike my real bike which failed me yesterday

This chainmail, its good and all
But I wish I didnt have to remove it
I dont want to make my friends suffer
But they still do.
I learnt to bottle it up…
Like thats going to help.

Just, need kevlar or something

It's happening again
I am spiraling down
Feeling like I am losing memory
Feeling like being a useless
Oxygen consumer

It's happening again
My life being ******* up
Me going and knocking
On the doors I said I wouldn't

It's finally happened
I am there
Everything was blurry
But I am there

Are you listening to me?
Look me in the eyes.
Listen

I will wait for you

Let it snow, rain, heavy rain, sun, near death

Believe in me, that's all I would ask of you
It doesn't cost a lot

If you do believe/ or do not

I will still be waiting.

At the spot you ask of me
I will maintain the same patience when you met me
I will wait for you like everyday.

Just.. Believe in me, that's all I demand.

I am just a useless metal
probably kryptonite
hated by the person
who is loved the most

I am probably kryptonite
known to everyone
but hated by all

Maybe you should join the troupe
and start hating me
because that's all my world lacks
more haters..

That's what I have become

If you just suddenly stop talking
and then you realize that you have hurt me
you show up to apologize profusely
yes, i understand
but I know why you left
and i know you have things to attend to
that's why i don't take it to the heart
but everyone just apologizes

I understand
I really do
I don't want to become a burden for anyone
where you have to apologize
every. time.

I feel being a burden
and i don't like that feeling

I hate being someone who is freeloading
or not contributing to the effort
I don't want to be a burden
I can carry tremendous loads
I have enough intelligence to detect
me being a burden
just
please

Don't keep apologizing profusely
I understand your reasons
It was partly my fault for not replying
which is why you left
You shouldn't apologize
I should!

I realized a lot of things
For one- Running helps
Two- late nights are reserved
Three- summer is here
Four- i cannot rhyme
Five- what am i doing

Six- i shall see you later

I am afraid
To be told that I am not cool enough

Call it societal conformity
i thought i already told it a no
but i think it didn't hear me correctly

But those thoughts keep haunting me
not to be left behind
don't do stupid things

but..
...
...
...

its a huge mess
and can't clear it
but I just feel like a
seeker of attention

how much worse can it get?
very. much.

Raindrops dripping from the cold skies
Rain falling around us
Just a light drizzle
and us standing under the rain
just, standing
and looking at each other
removing all imperfections
and just staring at each others eyes
and rejoicing everything,

Rain drips down your,
hair, soaking wet
I am soaking too
but we look at each others eyes
Light Blue and Dark Brown
and just kiss
standing under the rain
under the cloudy skies
and kiss
with our hands intertwined
and still soaking

*We enjoy the moment

My heart is hurting
everyday
every. single. day.

That's unfortunate
I thought I taught myself
to live without talking to you
for a while...

Guess my heart
just adores you..
and misses you

There stands a lonely warrior
Unheard of.
Unknown of.
On his ships mast on the Mare Nostrum

He dared to endure it.
He dared to land into the sea of the Gods.
He dared to fight back their demons.
On the cost of his life.

He was the most daring of them all.
He was the beginning of his kind.
His courage was unmatched. He was better than Ares, himself.
He was going to defeat those demons. NOW.

He would defeat them,
but not just yet.
First he had to go through the sirens.

Their beautiful music
ohhh, it would enchant any sailor.
His first test would begin if he could get past them.
Their music would tear his heart apart
and if he landed on the shore
He would be ripped apart.

Next would be a few water monsters
Hydras, few land monsters
Then the demons
He would be prepared for them.

HE would take them down like.. Julius drinking his wine
But until he reached them.
He had time
Time to *prepare himself for what lay ahead

…
About you and death
about love and indifference
about life
about the world
about myself
about everything


it doesn't feel good..