I remember the pain
and remember the tears
that evil man caused me
for all those years

I remember the hurt
I remember his hands
as he whispered 
and I followed demands

I closed my eyes 
as I fought away tears
I laid still and kept quiet
for all those years

He loves me, I know it,
this couldn't be bad
He took full advantage 
of the trust I had

I kept all our secrets,
I had no choice
He'd ripped open my chest
and stolen my voice

I was reminded again
after every assault
that what happened
was conpletely my fault

I had been bad,
had misbehaved
from the wrath of my mother
I was being saved

He tried to tell me
she was evil and mean 
But the real devil, 
I had already seen

His lies never fooled me,
with mom I was safe
She was my only hope
and my only escape

a clean white page
freshly pressed
lined with blue
punched three times
stared back at my face

a single hand
took to pen
scribbled in the margin

words told stories
which recounted memories and dreams
blank ink streamed over the freshness

connecting lines to swirls
and dots to dots
sparking electricity

the lines save me from my past
and protect me from the future
decoding each line
I wait to find the answer

Calm
Like a romance,
The linden trees are slowly rustling.
On your lips warm waves
Shine perfume, life and fire.
I wanted you
So much
And you, and you alone,
Not I -
As much as I might have wanted you -
You
Were the one who opened my lips
And moistened them with yours
For the first time.

The linden trees are rustling,
My love,
Far is the Danube
And its small benches call to us
To go
To sit
To hear her,
Breathe her,
The asphalt warm under your soft, fair body,
Curved like a miracle - in every place perfection -
Would be cold next to your serene skin,
Hot, moist, covered
With the most beautiful thin summer dress -
Oh, child, young yet strong in your kiss,
Candor in a starry sky...

Waiting, ever waiting
The young wait for their life to begin
Until they get old and wait to die

Waiting, ever waiting
Watch the bus pulling away,
And count the seconds as they run away towards infinity
Watch the clock pick your pocket like a vulture picks a corpse
Waste your time dreaming
Waste yourself drinking
Live your life a slave to a screen and a victim to the clock

Waiting, ever waiting
Wait your days away, and tell yourself the time will come
Watch the time come and go, through the ever revolving door
Someday, tomorrow, in a week, fooling yourself with broken promises
Until one day the hospital heart monitor delivers your final deadline

Time’s up.