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I have these little moments of boldness, sometimes.
Hidden behind the smokescreen
Of smiles and self-effacing humor.
I have these seconds when I consider
What might happen
If I slid my fingers along your jaw
And showed you something serious
That flickers behind my laughter.
These little jolts of courage and curiosity.
And in those moments,
I do things that I look back on and my heart races.
As a rule I am not bold,
I do not take what I want,
I wait.
But every so often
I say
To hell with it
In my head
And show you a moment of depth.
I'm not accustomed to it,
That kind of honesty.
Not with you.
But someday soon I know I will pull you close
And forget that I am afraid you won't kiss me back.
 Jul 2013 Shawn White Eagle
Ugo
In the burning right hand of the bald city,
denizens frame calories and count instagram blessings
while beacons of hope refund inspiration in USADA *** cups.

Abyssinian maids wail over yesterday lovers
who wore Ginsberg’s skirt with less  pizzazz
and watched bedbugs **** blood off knee caps
wondering, what if Jesus Christ drove a Nissan?

As bullets of paragraphs fall Vietnamese pesticides on my head,
The dusts off my breath sing homilies
With letters of broken leather whiskey,
For even in the most dishonest jest,
clandestine toothbrushes are overrated
and every first false lie is the only truth.
 Jul 2013 Shawn White Eagle
Ugo
Night is for the hours
Cowards,
Let a man of God speak or night
Will continue to burn flowers

It's been said napkins are the greatest currency
For it holds the food spittle of man
Like how ambulances sit waiting
To clean up after misfortunes
And make fortunes for the fortun-
Who Ate paragraphs of spider webs
And patted weaves like black men seating at the back of the limited luxurious Q46 bus nodding heads to the noise of Toyota cameras they couldn't afford in the land where they spend $300 million to part the seas for summer entertainment
While they only spent $40 on California cuteness and walked on water with 13 Jesus' and ate at the bottom of the sea with only three tokes from the plastic bag

Let a man of God speak or night
Will continue to burn flowers
For we graduated from 30 hot nights of mathematics
Only to find that the future will always be white and in the *******
Ash coats the skies that were once blue
A paintbrush of black over the green brand new.
The fire burns throughout the fields,
Destroying any enemy it deems unworthy of life.
Searing heat permeates the air,
Thick humidity pierces the lungs
Cages of smoke capture their vision,
While I run for hills
To escape this life circumcision.
Flesh upon bone and fabric upon flesh,
Burns both gracefully and with ferocity.
Their screams encompass the peace that once was Elysium.
There is no escape from this terror and fear,
For there is no refuge far, no refuge near
A place of sanctuary, no place for pain
Why would one come here to suffer these things again.
As this paradise burns to the ground,
I wonder what of those who wait to migrate,
To this place looking for peace, to only find death and despair.
They have nothing left to live for,
Only sorrow to bear,
For once their lives are over,
They have no resting place there.
No holy place of healing where their bodies can be renewed,
No fields or Sun so pure that their sins are memories refused.
What so they have to look towards
In their short time on that Earth,
Just a place for which their bodies lie,
Rotting beneath the hearth.

Ashes to ashes,
Dust to dust.
For life eternal
One no longer should lust.
Gone are the days of yore
When intellectualism was a preserve
Of the privileged and distinguished in society
A family ‘heirloom’ passed on to succeeding generations

Over the years the human mind
Has morphed into a think tank of awe and bamboozlement
An object for advancement…and destruction almost in equal measure
A portal to self-destruction

Political pundits passionately discourse in the corridors
Of power over an issue as mundane as   food taxes
Am ****** if this aint a move to subjugate the populace
Whilst reveling in the guise of representing the best interests of the electorate


It’s a slap in the face of reason and logic
A soiling and tainting of mother earth’s unconditional benevolence
Extended to her humble earthlings as bountiful harvest
But a means of self-aggrandizement it is for the politicians and their loyalists
Apparently this is *
political correctness
I beseech the heavens to confer upon the technocrats of this world **common sense**...cause...it's kind of a novelty to which they are unfairly or selectively denied
On silken wings and silken strings
the garden doth awake
and from their beds those sleepy heads
their petals gently shake
a snail or two say how are you
as bumblebees take wing
to nectar sweet with sticky feet
as skylarks start to sing
a ladybug sleeps yet so snug
beneath a quilted leaf
her dreams untold as wings unfold
as earthworms crawl beneath
the ants at work refuse to shirk
they have no time to play
and cabbage whites like stars at night
take flight and fly away
the field mouse and wooded louse
attract the watchful eye
of tawny owl and feathered fowl
that own the morning sky
a homeward cat puts pay to that
no bird is fool enough
to try to land where danger stands
All teeth and claws called Fluff
so morrow breaks and nature wakes
and soon enough will we
but until then this land of men
is theirs so naturally
“When I was young, you fascinated me.
You were always so beautiful
So perfect.
You had a wide smile,
and beautifully deep eyes.
You had a glowing warmth,
that my childhood body grew up surrounded in.
In your arms I felt safe and whole.
Your arms were my home.

When your arms began to get weaker and weaker,
I couldn’t understand.
Where was the life I once knew?
The life I loved so dearly?
The soul was still there,
But the life,
The life was slipping away.
Your arms were my home,
But you were letting in the rain.
The house was crumbling before our eyes,
And you couldn’t help it.

The last time I ever saw you again,
Was on a cool summers morning.
You were sat in a wheelchair,
And it wasn’t your home.
You smiled amidst a backdrop of wild greens, and pretty flowers.
I asked you to stay with me always,
And you promised you would.
Your arms were my home.
I’d be without shelter otherwise.

Well, God works in weird and wonderful ways,
And the day your soul departed from my world,
Was the day my heart crumbled,
Into a thousand tiny pieces.
I had convinced myself that you had broken your promise.

But my twenty year old self looks back,
With hindsight,
With knowledge,
With faith and with wisdom,
That a thirteen year old girl can never have.

You kept your promise.
You are always with me.
In a light summer rain,
In a bitter winters night,
Amidst the beautiful browns and golds of an Autumn day.

You are the beautiful warmth that fills my heart,
Every time it beats.

Your arms are always my home.”
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