on all the years i've been wondering the purpose of my life,
this year has been the hardest,
the year that i've been pushed the most.

but of all the pushes i've experienced,
i still don't know my purpose in life.

there are days where you just think blankly
think,
and wonder why certain things happen to people.
you wanna give up,
but at the same time you don't.
you're feeling hopeless,
but you're trying to look for something hopeful,
even if it's just a small thing.

I want to be gone,
but at the same time, I just want this to end.
we're all sad,
but there are times where we just crave to be happy.

his eyes, so peaceful whenever he looks at me
his eyebrows, so thick
his hair, curly, but in a way that I like to caress it for life
his lips, so perfect for mine
his nose, the cutest I've seen

I want to remember each and every detail of your face,
every quirk that you make when you're either
happy, sad, annoyed, or confused,
I want all of them remembered at the back of my mind

that when someone asks my future,
that would be my explanation.

maybe it's the adulting life that's slowly sinking in
maybe it's the harsh reality that makes anyone feel numb
or maybe it's just everyday that there's always a part that we need to be strong

but whatever it is,
whatever the world may throw,
or if everyone else is trying to bring anyone down,

I know that I will always have you,
and it's beyond unimaginable and surreal that you're patient with me,
that you still care for me,
and that you'll always be there,
in these tough times.

thank you for being with me.
I'm so glad you exist.

I witnessed a specific type of bird today.
It was walking through the rocks in the sea, trying to mind and fight the waves.
All I was thinking was, "Can he do it?" not even keeping in mind if the bird has a destination.
"Will he do it?"
"Can he reach the end?" where the end isn't even known.
Then, when the bird reached the almost end of the rocks, I thought to myself, "Can he fly?"
Pure thoughts of hesitations and doubts flew into my mind.
And when the bird flew, I said to myself, "Oh, he can."
Which made me think, why did I doubt the bird that he can fly in the first place?