Submit your work, meet writers and drop the ads. Become a member
You see your friends told me that you had complaints. But I can't tell since you are always in my face. If you can't be a man you know what you can do. Pack your bags and leave the cash because baby we are through.

There's no doubt that I've had it up to here. There is no doubt there will be no more crying no more tears. There is no doubt about the way I made you feel. ******* you know that my love was real.

I am sick and tiered of you running your lines. Get up out of my face because you are wasting your time. I won't hold your hand the way your mama use to. I have no time to sit and deal with this drama. Since you can't be a man you can stay with your mama.

You know what? I've had it up to here. No more crying no more tears. It's all about the way that I made you feel. Because you know that I am the real.
This was written over 15 years ago. It is something that people still deal with today. I hope that someone has the ability to use it to grow up. While others use it to move on. -Sweetlemon
I thought that I knew you well. I guess not because look at the lies that you tell. I don't know who you are. Heck do you?                 
                                                        
    You walk around smiling as if you are so kind an innocent. When you are gushing over with your sneaky ways..and the
                          lies. Life would be so much easier if you were   honest and upfront.  
                                                     
   You say one thing to me and another to them. It all comes back. You pretend to be lost an confused.                                                        ­
                                                
           The worst part is that you act as if it's everyone's fault but yours. A man owns up to his words an actions. A man wants to be seen. He doesn't hide behind accessories. Be who you really are. Introduce yourself to the world. Because all they know about you right
now..is that you.
      are... The Lie.
Sometime you just can't take people serious. Don't stress what you can't change. -Frances Lillian Bynum
It is hard to believe that you can love someone so much. Such personality from someone so small. Since the day that I laid eyes on you I loved you.
You were like a mini me.
I could also see my mother in you. When you first came over you looked at the walls. I wondered what you were looking at. There were pictures on each side of my bed. You knew where you were by them. You would look at them and smile.  
Such an intelligent little baby girl. You were
born with knowledge. You questioned everything. Your understanding and ability to discern is remarkable. You are such an amazing baby. Grandma loves you and wants nothing less than everything perfect for you. My Vali my world you are always going to be Grandmas first Grand-Girl.
My first grand daughter. My monster and my joy.
Ms. Naomi you were such a surprise. I did not know what to think where I heard that you were coming. When I looked into those big pretty eyes I fell in love. You were born with sarcasm and a warm heart.
You are like your grandma.
At just a few weeks you and your Mommy were arguing. You wanted to eat and she was learning to feed you. You pushed her and fussed and she fussed back. I knew then that you were a fighter.
One day as I held you your eyes were closed.
I kept trying to get you to open them. You turned your nose up and turned your head. I thought this child is mean. You then turned back around and smiled. I have been in love with you every since. You are such a beautiful baby girl. Your Grandma loves you. Thank you for being mine.
My second grand daughter and third grandchild.
Pagan Paul  Mar 2017
Jibberish
Pagan Paul Mar 2017
.
Fazzy moams on wivvel crusts
carry jazms on flocked pavs.
Rinkulled witty over sark
unburcoaled plinks of bloo.

Serry nark are they cronking
and fillipas grapples in kloque.
Verx on spappled gurns are they
torting through gattering weems.

Fernol wend the schism klone
Glolling fast in clutty pawk.
Scenty flox drozzle by teas
Nisting on cowt rinnalled dawn.

Yurish casts of nash pigoon
stoz over hinty-hanty bynum.
When in merdeen lemp quimsy
dilly noff flyx and wempwarble.

For loofin under korots mingle
At the imtem tong fallop.
Shoozy bales of cremp deflate
and gwample rooks the plisties.


©Pagan Paul (22/06/16)
.
From my old notebook I found recently :)
Yes there is a story in it!
PPx
.
This life is new to me and I am learning to enjoy the moments. There have been many first times just this year. I now understand what it means to love at first sight. Loving unconditionally has been taught from watching my children love their mates. There are new fights that are being fought. No not with hands as we grow those fights are done away with. The fight for another day is with in me.
While many other things are on constant repeat. There are many new experiences that are being had. Today was the first day that I believe my sister finally tried to understand me. People sometimes paint you to be the person that they think that you are. Or who they want you to be. When I listen to people tell me who I am. What kind of person have always been and it is laughable. It is more than strange that people can know you all of your life and know nothing about you. I have been told that, “you only let people get so close.” This might be true but if I do it should say a lot to you. Trust is earned and never just given.
If I push you away it is because you put me in the situation to. New dreams and heart beats warm my inner being. My mind-set is different. Before I wanted you to know that I am there for you and would put myself to the side to provide. I never looked for anything in return. That mind-set has changed. I can no longer give my all to everyone. I have learned to replenish myself no other human can do that for me.
I am not returning calls that I don’t want to make. I will no longer participate in events to show others that I care. I will not lack sleep to benefit someone that does not deserve my attention. If I delete you I am not interested in knowing that you are offended. You earned your deletion and I hope that you do well. With these small first's I can’t wait to see what more is to come.
As we age we change and as long as the changes are good embrace them
If tomorrow never comes don’t mourn for me because I have finally found good sleep. No, I won’t be able to hear you as you post your fake love on social media. Because I will have finally found the true meaning of peace. I won’t hear or see your tears because I will be asleep. You won’t find me in heaven or your term of hell. For these things don’t exist for me. I will not be among the ones that reign in heaven although I do hope that they enjoy their new life. Nor will I be burning in hell, Hell is a common grave and no God of mine would treat people that way.
He is a God of love and mercy so know that, if tomorrow never comes I have the hope of the resurrection. Make sure that My children know that they are my heart and that I hope to see them when I awake. For those that I have spoke the word from the bible with, I hope that they continue to learn. If tomorrow never comes for those that lost contact stay lost. Please don’t come around I won’t be able to see or hear you. But there is no love lost.
If tomorrow never comes remember that those that you love must know it. Serve Jehovah to the full he is so amazing and deserves your love and so much more. Those that were there with and for me you mean the world to me. Don’t run up bills on student loans or trying to buy homes. Travel and give love where it’s needed and deserved. If tomorrow never comes I will see you in the new world. Same girl but we will be in a perfect world!
Tomorrow is not promised. While given away to leave a message it is wise to use it.

— The End —