Atnight I shrink to my father and fear…with closedeyes…my thoughts appear and disappear….in perpetualfog…oneminute, I am ugly…another, lazy…then, an unworthy, helpless, hopeless, heap…hunchedover…and in pain…with arms poised to protect…body contorted to distort…but whatever I clingto…and all I resist..u-n-f-o-l-d-s i-n d-a-y, w-h-e-n m-y e-y-e-s t-h-a-t s-t-r-a-i-n s-e-a-m-l-e-s-s-l-y o----p----e----n