Phases of faces, captured moments and instances
I pass by, so swiftly, so fleetingly
Caught in the crossroads of paradigms and decisions
I stood paralyzed, terrified.

I meet intense eyes that bore through me, knowing me, knowing us
A smile as warm as the sun that has the power to melt me
Your presence is strong, comforting…strong, unsettling…strong, terrifying
You have me without even trying, you mesmerize me.

You bring me to my knees with a sigh,
you can crush me with a word.
You can bring me to bliss with a touch,
you can bring me to ecstasy with a kiss.

You command me with a whisper, I am drawn to you
You break down my china walls, one by one
You undress my layers of failed expectations
Of shattered dreams, and broken hearts

I stand before you, naked, vulnerable
I look away, not bearing for you to see
My helplessness, my hopelessness
All my imperfections, my fears, my desires.

You wipe my tears away, and kiss my bitterness away
And yet the fear descends on me…I’ve been here before
Fear of hurt, of betrayal, of disappointment
Fear that this is all an illusion…or perhaps just my delusion

And so I put on a smile, cool and composed
Hide behind my fast-paced life, run far away from you
Going so fast, so fast…so I won’t think, I won’t feel
Until I fall, exhausted, to sleep a dreamless sleep

I need the noise, the meaningless clanging
For in silence, the longing creeps in…
To be in your arms, just us and nothing else…
Nothing but warmth and the sound of our hearts beating.

So I welcome the numbness, welcome the pain
Punish myself for the choice I’ve made in my weakness
Someday I will find my happiness, someday I will find my strength
Somehow…I will find you again.

I love your hair the most.
Thick, black
Black in truth and the baring of it.
Black in solidity,
something I'm not used to.

Your eyes, dark brown,  
expressing much more than you allow them to.
They don't reflect the light around them.
They reflect the purity of you.
When I look into them I don't see myself
I see you.
I don't see what I am
I see what I'm lacking.

Your lips are plush like ecstasy.
They remind me of frosted strawberry ice cream.
I wouldn't mind losing myself there,
lingering for days.
Your smile has my heart plunging into fire.
Even a pout will take my breath away.

Whenever you feel insecure about your body
I'm left wondering why.
I'm drawn to it.
All dips and curves.
If you were mine I'd show you
why you should never be ashamed of it.

You hate it when I stare at you
I know.
But you don't understand that
When I look at you
The world
It just...
It just stops.
It stops and nothing else exists except for you
And my eyes looking at you.

There is nothing else.
The people in the room
Melt away.
The worries I have?
All *******.
There's no yesterday
No tomorrow
No differences that can tear us apart
Or tear my eyes off you.
You make everything else
Distant
And insignificant
Compared to the magnitude of my
Love
For you.
And the beauty and depth and wonders
Of the soul that I see
In your eyes.

I see your pain
And your joy;
I notice your laughter and your struggles and all the things that intrigue you
And all of it fascinates me.

I want to know all of it.
I want to know what turns you on,
I want to know what makes you click,
I want to know what you think about
When you have long car rides to yourself.
I want to know what infuriates you
I want to know what on earth could turn your beautiful eyes into fires of hatred and loathing,
Or melt them into pools of the softest adoration.
I want to know your future,
And what you see in it.
And I want to know if you prefer blue Jell-O or red.
And do you ever wish you were short
Just so you could always win at hide-and-go-seek?
Or maybe as tall as a redwood so that you would never have to wonder how a bird sees the world.
If you could go to the moon, would you?
Or would you stay here, in mock safety, to welcome home those who went in your place?
If you could have one super power
Would you care to hear everyone's thoughts
Or would you want to be able to run
Fast as a speeding bullet
Away from here.
I want to know your wildest fantasies
And can we make them a reality together.
I want to know your past
I want to know what makes you who you are
And what brought you here
To me.
I want to know everything
Hold back nothing
But not until you're ready.

When I look at you
I just want to talk.
Forever.
About everything and nothing
And when I look at you I want to sit in silence
Because that's comfortable too.
When I look at you
I want to spill my soul
Because I know you'd catch it.
I can see it
In your eyes.

When I look at you
I draw from your strength
I refresh from your smiles
And I remember who I am.

When I look at you
You are the only thing that exists.
You
And my eyes looking at you.
And it is truly beautiful.
You are truly beautiful.
And that
Is why I stare.

And there once was a day when I took a drive
Drove hundreds of miles
Back to the place where we first met
Back to the street you swept me off my feet
And I can still hear your voice
Vibrating through the halls
Can still see the breath
Drifting from your lips
Those ripped jeans
And over sized shoes
But nothing compares to the look you gave me
The glitter in your eye you tried to hold onto
I knew then, you'd be somehow significant to me
And here I am
Driving hundreds of miles
Racing away from these feelings that overwhelm me
Only to know
You never deserved me

As your hands work steady and with knowledge of all you do, I am inspired;
As you take the coat of lambs and stitch it into garment, I am inspired;
As you take “a little of this, and a little of that”, and form basic salt, water and yeast into living bread, I am inspired;
As you tend your garden, coaxing seed into living nourishment, I am inspired;
As you overcome the loss of a loved one, and regain a sense of purposeful life, I am inspired;
As you balance work and family, striving to instill moral values in your children, I am inspired;
As you suffer the pains of childbirth only to set those children free, I am inspired;
As you retell the family stories, giving evidence to tradition, love and respect, I am inspired;
As you honor, cherish and revel in the gift of female friendship, I am inspired;
As you live your faith, weaving it in the fabric of life and love, I am inspired;
And for all of these things that have set the bar high for myself and the other women, we are ALL inspired and truly blessed to have known you.

I dream of you sometimes still
I confess
At how things ended between us
Of bitterness
Wondering how something so good soured
So Fast
Nostalgic at the times we had and that you
Couldn't last
But in the melancholy I
Won’t wallow
And while endings are bitter pills, this one's not so difficult
To swallow
And I know I won't miss all the trivial games
You played
Because in my nightmare you didn't leave
You stayed

Curious and strong
That is how I was raised
by you and your guiding hand

Truth was a virtue, as was sincerity
in the life you built for me
For us

I learned to see the world through
your hand-me-down blue eyes
so similar to mine

I learned to embrace life through
your arms wrapped tightly around
my small shoulders

I learned not to take life so seriously by
hearing your laughter fill our cozy home
and my tiny ears with joy

I learned to embrace life through
your arms wrapped tightly around
my small shoulders

I learned not to take life so seriously by
hearing your laughter fill our cozy home
and my tiny ears with joy

I learned to hold the weight of the world by
balancing on your solid shoulders and
never being afraid of falling

Curious and strong
That is what I have become
Thanks to you and your guiding hand