I'm feelin' it
hope you are too
hungry for love
but mostly you

I have a mouth
that I wanna use
to show off my skills
hoping to impress you

your love is sweet
good enough to eat
all I wanna do is please
like I do in my dreams

temporary lust
permanent
thoughts

could this be love?

it's not just that
it's the warm breath
you feel upon your neck
it's the hot feeling
you feel going through
your blood-pumping heart
it's the aftermath
of a night of shame
pleasure and pain
all of the above

well, not shame
just heaven
of the time
you hold
each other
close

adrenaline rush
is always the worst
because it leaves you
addicted to the fix
it keeps you in place
seeking the passion
that makes your heart race
seeking the heaven
in which you have found
in your sweetheart's love

i don't get myself
the swirls in my mind
won't stop telling me
that everyone secretly
hates me.

i ask them
everyday, they look at me
like i'm crazy.

what's wrong with me?
why can't i open the gate
to my fragile little heart
and let someone care about me?

always searching for someone to love me,
because i can't ******* love myself.

and always doubting their love,
because i can't ******* love myself.

never knew all this time
your curiosity for me
was just as much as mine was for you
when the lights are off
and the doors are closed
you're in my fantasies
we're in your car
you are aggressive in them
i knew it could never happen
until you said that
in your condo to me
you're out of state
where are you
now that you want me
i need you so bad
i'm a *****
for wanting the boy that someone has claimed
but the boy doesn't claim them
the secret affair has begun
never to leave the bed
our lips will be sealed
and our tongues will be at war
and our hands will explore
every part of each other's bodies
and you'll bite my neck
just like i've been waiting for

Life is akin to a train ride:
A trip to nowhere
With no viewable stops for rest
No given time
To answer nature's call.

Food served on the ride
Are oftentimes bland.
Sweet, bitter, sour
undeniably included
Though only given
On certain occasions.
Nevertheless,
Everything given
Was edible.

With each a cabin our own
We hear A scream or a cry
A laugh or a snort
As Noises transcends up and down
The confines of this boundless train.
The pleasures or woes  
Of other passengers
Not ours to share
But ours to listen.

Fuel being finite
Depletes
Kicking some poor passengers
Off this ride.
Other passengers take suit
Leaving on their own accord.
but the train still moves on
Towards an intangible destination

Things occur on the train:
Diseases, celebrations, fights.
There may be obstacles, obstructing the track
The train swirls a large turn,
goes over a bump
And Into a cave.

But nonetheless
We're all together
On this ride.
*If we don't help each other
We're all doomed together.

"Psst" I whispered
To the man walking by
My fingers curled
To bade him here.

"What's the meaning of happiness"
I questioned him.
"It's the sun that shines,
The clouds, the grass, the flowers and words. Yes, words."
He said with a convincing look
And so I thought
I'd have a look.

'The sun that shines'
– How the hell do I reach the sun?
Skip.
"The clouds"
–can't reach it either.
Skip.
"The Grass"
– they never seem to reply me
Next.
"The flowers"
– They're all wilting already.
Next.
"Words"
– What are words?

And so I waited
At the same spot the next day
To question that very same man.

*but he never came

Day after day you're
critiquing, pulling apart
anguishing over pointless details

You scold, you demand
your silent booming voice is ugly
never stops reverberating between my ears

Torture and twist
even after they tell me,
"You look sick"

You paint cold purple
streaks up and down my skin
You deny me time and time again

Each rib has been counted
scrutinized through my skin-
but it is never enough in your eyes

I feel insane, wishing I could
scream and shout
out of my head to drown you out

Today I love you
as you're an old friend
Tomorrow I hate you
as you put me through hell again

I've tried to silence you
yet I always give in
ending up in my own prison.