I fell for the guy you used to be
Before you knew
You had a piece of me

late nights
when I know he's leaving me
and I sit in the cold
broken hearted

fog clouds
and I hear them, the echoes
of her in their voices
I can't stand it

it seeps
deep into my pores, filling my veins
with doubt, anger, confusion
bringing it all back

If fire burns
and destroys
everything
in it’s path

then why
do I want
to touch
the stars

so badly

can self destruction
really be so
beautiful

I miss walking to your car
Wildly undressed
For the weather
As always
Yet radiant in the snow
Always scanning the backs of cars
For your Illinois plate
Reminded every time
That you’re a city kid
Probably much too cool for me

You step outside your car
Even though it’s cold
And you’re stepping into slush
The crud that cakes up in the parking lot
I miss seeing your face
That catlike smile
As I speed walk across asphalt
Smiling myself
Hard enough to make my cheeks sore
But there’s not a care in the world
When I crash into your arms

The air is cold but you are warm
My heart gets wrapped up
In a tight cocoon of you
Then we break and you say
We should get in your car
It’s cold and I left my coat again
Then I’m in your passenger seat
You’re offering me matcha candy
Or maybe just looking at me
With those bedroom eyes
Dark behind your glasses
Yet lit up all the same

I miss that sweet first kiss
The soft heat of your lips
Pressed up against mine
Gentle and hungry
A restrained fever of want
Given away by your hand on my cheek
Thumb tracing across my lips when you pull back
Gazing at me like I’m something
To be savored
Cherished and mouthed at
The tender want in your eyes
That I miss
The moment you look away