5 months pass, I’ve now found my way, moving on was fighting a fire
Memories made, months of bliss, now lighting a funeral pyre
A skip in time, the horizon behind. Now I have found someone better
Tells me the truth, I can’t believe lies. The fear has no cause to fetter

In this new realm, joy I now seek, my darkest days into bright nights
A soulmate and purpose, a plan of attack, on life I now set my sights
Occasional glances, ones over my shoulder, have lessened and now gone slack
My head hits the pillow, my mind all but quiet. The memories come flooding back

A place almost familiar, it takes me an instant, something’s not quite in place
Looking around, remembering where, that’s when I see her face
Effortless beauty, a touch so gentle, Her smile made seraphim cry
She walks up to me, look down, holding hands, look up, lock eyes.

The memory vivid, queue music, we dance. Rhythmically stepping on a star
The late nights, the middays. the first kiss, the last. Knowing how much would scar.
All flooding back, I know what happens, wishing this dream would last forever
A piece of myself, a fragmented soul. My heart now starts to grow heavier.

Bolting awake, a tornado of thoughts, I’m crying and I don’t know why
Pulling myself out of a slumber, my head in my hands while staring into the sky
10 years have passed, I have moved on and gotten on with life
In bed next to me, somebody stirs, Not her but the one I call wife.

I can’t quite explain it, the feeling she gave, all of my cards on the table
I always bet big, waiting for love, but everyone knows of this fable
A dream, nothing more, I couldn’t resist, I had to fly close to the sun
Accomplished my goals, beating this game, still feeling it hadn’t been won.

Conscious and aware, I look to my side, the woman repairing me still
Deserving of love, taking a chance, helping me climb up this hill
My hope and my anchor when mind starts to wander, she wakes and sees tears in my eyes
She grabs me, pulls close. Smells of lilacs and honey. The look on her face, so alive.

Smooth and gentle, whispering to me, Telling me everything’s okay
“You know who you are… You know that I love you” saving my psyche from fray
Always the words, listens and tries, never fathoming leaving her side.
She was the one. My dawn after night. In her everything I confide.

Time has passed since the heartbreak of me and you.
A sudden peace has filled my soul, a feeling, like the truth.
But in an instant, contempt is gone, hollowness in place.
A love-song. A waltz. A memory. Gives mind a cause to race.

Daybreak so close, now back to night, a quantum lapse of time.
Regret and pain. A mask of clarity. Happiness, just a mime.
In the darkness, answer searching. All my thoughts are grey
If only she would love me back, my soul and heart would stay.

Unloved, unwanted, unneeded. Alone amongst the stars.
Helplessly spinning, adrift in space, looking for love in bars.
I cannot stop my choices. Fallen angels, my hearts desire.
Foreseen ruin. Oracled collapse. Everything ends in fire.

Emotion run wild, paranoia and fear, my heart now saying too much.
One look in her eyes and just as I feared, I’ve forever lost her touch
If not her then another, one that I would wait for in silence
Could never get over, to my heart she has a license

I want us forever so badly, it hurts
But to say something to her would require words.
Ones I think but can’t form to say, a simple phrase that I love her
Any future of us, romance and fairytale, now hell in a rupture

And so now, a tragic villain, cursed to wander alone
Quiet in the universe, with no-one to call home.
I drift into acceptance knowing there’s no end I can see
Falling. Falling. Falling. Down. There’s no one here for me.

The noise upstairs can’t be reigned in
A breath of silent air, a look to my steed.
Like a knight off to war, a countdown from ten
My demons chase daily, doubt planted, a seed

Nine words to split my heart is all it would take
“Just leave me alone. I don’t love you anymore.”
Just irrational emotion, but I feel anger and hate
This final phrase as I walk out the door.

Eight paces away, I step onto my ride
The visceral growl, now broken the quiet
Two wheels beneath, in the machine I confide
Awake and aware, required to pilot.

The sins, seven deadly, they leer and they whisper
The visor hides panic, my heart grows tired
Six words of my own, “Why do I still love her?”
My eyes stream tears, my face is on fire.

My thoughts, a hammer, was that all I meant?
Onto the freeway, five fingers roll the throttle
For this can’t be how our story finds its end
I cry. Raw emotion breaks from its bottle

Three times I have fallen for the same ploy
Faster and faster, the skyline becomes a blur
In traffic I hide, a terrified little boy
It chases, I race, uncertain, unsure

Too apathetic to care, like a jet on the ground
The terror of love haunts all around
The wind roars past, I begin to blackout
I scream and close my—

One text.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean that. Please come back. I love you.”
I let go of the throttle, the scenery now vivid
In my heart and soul I know that it’s true.
As the bike cools off, I return to her quiet and timid.

An argument no more, we talk through it and explain
At peace, we kiss, lay down, and promise never again.