I was never this soft
So breakable
I was a hard cover book
Strong and new
That you bent back to read
Allowing myself to be so easy.

Now my spine is broken
Cover clearly used
Abandoned,
Alone,
Abused
How could you?

My story remains
With pages still intact
Someone else will come along
Gentle enough
To repair my broken back.

I’m fragile
Susceptible to further damage
Cracked down the middle
Barely hanging
Slowly healing

Does this story get a sequel?
Another chance for something real
I’m fearful I’ll never recover
With pages badly wilted
Discolored
Torn, and bent back.

Greasy thumbprints
Smeared along my text
Leaving permanent imprints
On my once pretty print.

My story has changed too.
How could this remain a fairytale,
After consuming the forbidden fruit?

I’m half dead
And my book
Has been read through
By someone who skipped ahead
Just to know the end
And stupidly,
I let them.

Thinking that if they knew
All the secrets of my story
The struggles
The success
My journey
They would love me
Not leave me.

If only I kept my chapters safe
Knowing I’m worthy
For a slower pace
Not rushed through
And read in a day.

You might have read the ending
Little do you know
That was the preface.

Better yet,
I’ll remove you completely
Editor’s revision says
There is no space for you here.

Backspace, delete.
Now you're just history
All that is left
Is to empty the trash bin.

When I was younger,
as our lips met
I was so eager
to free you
          from your fabric bonds
I was in such a hurry
to liberate you
         from the oppressive clothing
that was strangling your body
                inhibiting your beauty
                hiding the soft curves of your skin
I treated our time together
like a small child would treat a Christmas gift,
Greedily tearing away at the wrapping paper
to retrieve the object of his desire.

Unaware that anticipation can be just as rewarding
as the reward itself

My priorities have shifted
          I've learned

Let me just lay next to you
admire you as you bite your lip
   enticing a kiss.

    Just a small one

Let me run my hand down your arm
as my fingers find yours and
   i n t e r t w i n e

Let me watch as your eyes follow mine
into the place where no words
need be spoken

I want to listen to your heartbeat
                   There's no need to rush this.

I want to get lost with you in this moment

                 Just for a bit

Before we're lost in the passion of the night

Mother Earth's Skin Oozed Between My Toes,
As I Listened To The Trees Whisper To Me,
"It's Okay, Just Let Go"
The Heat Of The Day Warmed Me To My Core,
Beads Of Perspiration Collected On My Forehead,
As My Burning Feet Cooled In The River,
The Songbirds Whistled A Soothing Tune,
"It's Okay, Just Let Go"
As My Body Sunk To The Ground,
And Became One With Our Mother,
The River Swirled Around My Feet,
Singing As It Lapped Upon My Skin,
"It's Okay, Just Let Go"
And With That, I Did

There's something reassuring about seeing the stars move in the celestial sky;
even though things feel stuck, the universe still revolves.
And from the ground looking up,
things look like they move slow.  
Yet, if I were to shuttle into outer space and see the earth from an aerial view,
I would discover that the world indeed spins fast,
and I should be thankful that life feels slow in comparison.

I hear myself singing,
the same song to you:
“You just don’t understand”.
And why must you need to?

You are not me,
it wouldn’t matter either way
if you did or didn’t agree.
I need not have you know my lyrics
or the reason behind my rhyme.

This time
I sing without your approval.
Self-respect comes from within.
I believe in my decisions.
I have to live with them.

And I need no good reason to cry
“Just because” is rationale enough.
An extended explanation
only satisfies your delusion
and encourages this illusion
that I’m not human
with innate emotion.

You ignorantly claim I’m dramatic
or raise your voice, “I’ve had it!”
When will you see
That volume won't change who I choose to be.
Lack of approval of appeal
I will still feel how I feel.

I care to careless
if I’m something you accept.
My only regret
Was giving you more as I settled for less.

It's a pity you’re so bound by your insecurities.
These personal projections,
And loose-lipped accusations
Created to think less of me
and brand me as weak.
I won’t change the degree
of my vulnerability.
It’s genuine and beautiful
Because it is unattainable.

Do you still here me singing?
The same song is still on.
Played by every station.
Get to the realization
the mental destination:
“You just don’t understand”.
And probably never will.

(Typing sound)

(A few seconds of silence)

(Pressing Backspace)

(Typing sound)

(Pressing Backspace)

(A sip of the tea)

(Mumbling)

(Typing sound)

I've been thinking of buying myself a fancy tea set.

(A second of silence)

(Typing sound)

Yes, I think I should buy myself a fancy tea set.

(Pressing Backspace)
(Pressing Backspace)
(Pressing Backspace)

(sigh)


@mosquito - 25.11.2012

It was a fool's game that should not begin
And you played it without honest rules
If you thought that you will always win
Well it's wrong 'cause it's a game for fools

If you thought that you can get me easy
And you tried to do this without honest rules
If you thought that my way to be is ******
Well it's wrong 'cause it's a game for fools


If you thought that you can hunt me slowly
And you danced this without honest rules
If you thought that I will love you only
Well it's wrong 'cause it's a game for fools


It was a morbid dance without real feelings
A dance of wishes without honest rules
If you thought that love means mutual dealings
Well it's wrong 'cause it's a game for fools

If you thought that you will be a winer
In this love fight without honest rules
If you thought I'm a cake at your dinner
Well it's wrong 'cause it's a game for fools


And if you thought you can get everything
In this world of yours without honest rules
If you thought that I'm an easy stupid thing
Well it's wrong 'cause it's a game for fools