The strangest subtelty exists
in humans, solely for our hubris to
Ignore; For not to instigate
falling to this subtlety in fear.

Yet those vagrant "apostles"
Praise this subtlety, this alternative,
In absolute pride.
As if embracement, is a better-ment
of their corrupt soul, living as if it is natural.

Preaching fear as Evil, spinning their
woven ignorance as idealism.
Basking in the witching hour calls.

Not to be mistaken as holy, but wreathed in thorns on my brow, I reply:
Desperate.

Grey asphalt
Lacking tar, cracking like glass
Dissuade onlookers from
Old hotel bay windows not yet boarded
Concrete cliffs

I have a right, you know
To go around
Catching all the flies that bother me

  Twisting my arm
      Clasping my hand(s)
Almost, playing with my prey
Holding onto tricks up my sleeve
Reaching like a madman

But you wouldn't you know it?!
I'm actually pretty good at doing it

Tear drops from the sky
Replay in my mind
Swinging heartstrings

Life falls through my eye
One left closed and blind
Safe in Memory

Rain plops on puddles
Drowning syncopation

Unbeknownst, Unrealized
Some how enshrined
Time doesn't just pass by

World forever lost to time
Marching on ahead of mine
Idle idealation tends to be the cause of human demise.

She tells me I act like I don't want her

I react like I don't want her I'll admit

But reactions are just that, rarely in full control

But it's the things I do that I know should show I want her

It's not the bed I want
It's her

It's not the **** I want
It's the interaction with her
At this point it could be cigarettes

It's not the pain I want
It's hearing her voice, seeing her engaged with me

Its not the movies I want to watch
I want to watch her watch the movie
She's beautiful, graceful, and hilarious
I might only get that once from her

It's not the food I want,
Though her cooking is my favorite
It's the thought and energy behind it I want to reciprocate

It's not the self satisfaction that I made her happy
It's the knowledge that she IS happy

It's not the home she makes I wanna come back to
It's her
The home could be the streets for me

I wish she could feel the way I feel

I wish I could be happy with her
But one can't just be happy...

If you write poetry to live,
You'll die.
You you live to write poetry,
You'll die trying to write poetry
If you write poetry to write poetry,
You'll only make prose
If you live to live,
You'll only ever survive.
If you truly live, you'll write poetry
When you write poetry, know you are truly living.

The intimacy of being known
The intimacy of doing something without being asked
The intimacy of doing literally anything with that person
Only because it's that person.
The intimacy of waking up next to that person
The intimacy of being woken up by that person
The intimacy of remembering what someone likes
The intimacy of remembering what someone dislikes
The intimacy of not needing to remember just doing it
The intimacy of reciprocating the energy of that person
The intimacy of being that energy
The intimacy of feeling human with someone
The intimacy of making someone else feel human
The intimacy of doing something only for that person without them knowing it was you
The intimacy of having something done for you without your knowledge of who, when, and how
The intimacy of appreciating someone's existence
The intimacy of your existence being appreciated
The intimacy of being in their presence
The intimacy in knowing if one were to explain how they felt they'd only being annoying and everything they said would be pointlessly wasted and feel meaningless to the reciprocant
The intimacy in having no ability to stand up for oneself against someone
The intimacy of being able to work through PTSD for someone
The intimacy of being able to ignore instinct for someone
The intimacy in learning oneself with someone

The love we don't see, is the most important to me

The cool breeze side-to-side
With a smile and a hard glare
The child in me wants to take you back
It's hard trying to show you what's within
When I know I have nothing
But forward momentum left.

Somehow I feel deep inside,
That the hard rock-rolled beach
Is where we should call home
And it's selfish of me to say,
I want to see you walk into that
Glacier Water Lake again
A fluid contradiction

I heard your voicemail,
It wasn't meant for me
You said his name again
Called me him, again.
I forgave you in the moment because
It's the forgiveness I don't feel after
That speaks the most.
The hurt and pain
Deep within the vast ocean of love
hoping I'll be enough
And I know it's not your fault,
The blame reaches you anyways.

But for your fractured mind,
I still feel your heart bleed

The contradictions I speak
Stem from craving versus desire
The passion I feel,
Against the love I harbour
Flow freely from face value
But caught and fought in fire
Of what I want, to what I want to give you

People don't want what they don't deserve
Ultimately.
The bad, and the good.
And it's evident I don't deserve anything.

I smell the steak you grilled last night,
It lingers

I feel the chills and instinct run heel to head,
Urging my forward gentle belligerence

I hear the faint disjointed breaths that take an eternity, and no time at all when you sleep

I taste the emotions that overpour from your steam engine and cap, remember to release the pressure sometimes

I see only what's in front of me, and what will be in front of me and all I see is you.

If I was ever renting a room in your heart,
Its surely closed off with cation tape.
However, a step through the door,
will reveal a well kept, seemingly pristine world.
After-all, I gave you what you wanted,
Nothing but the world.

Times change too often
For my frozen self,
Full of hope and wonder.
Who would have thought
Evil seeps into those near-
No matter the effort.

Floating whisps wrap my throat.
Subtley starving my blood.
I watch my ocean of love disappear-
Don't go...
The butterflies bounce in fluttery breaths
Only known by those who watched You fly.

Clarity never cleared my vision up,
But it seems doldrums cloud the glow, situated on my path.
How unfortunate it seems this boat cannot be fled from
Although flight seems at a beat's fail,
Death evades those it suffers but doesn't release.
Even sobbing duress cannot cry for
Where I was

Cool coconut caresses
The open sores in my mouth
From not eating.

I can't help it,
"I don't need it"
I tell myself

It burns but in the least satisfying way
I'd rather swallow fire than
Let myself eat a hole through my empty soul

Trudging through this creative poison
Using it like I use this
Eating away at the different layers of what I need to live

The world is a fragile place
A stone's throw and it'll shatter like glass.
It warps, contorts, and moves,
Just like it should,
But glass is fragile.

The World is a strange place
I throw rocks, just to skip along the water
But no matter where they went
I hurt you.

The winged boy, so unassuming
Stuck with his consuming thoughts
Can no longer stand the time it takes
To climb his peaks
If they keep shackling weights
To let gravity pull him down

Like Calamity loves to disrupt the Calm,
Like A Bad Day loves driving one, unloved child off the edge
Like a cat loves to eat her first child
Like a bee loves to help a flower ****
Like a crackhead loves their first pipe
like a Saying loves to be painstakingly true
Like how you love me
I will love you

Broken glass
Crunches under the feet
Of those lost to the sunset
Behind the corner store
Where it all went down
Something lost and nothing found
Waking up, remembering what’s right
To see what’s not left
And realizing what you are.

Pulled into the bubbling depths
Of what’s left of your soul
Clawing your way up
Ready to blow away all in sight,
All in reach.

Words drop bombs
Blowing away
Lying a foundation
Building in contrary to destroying
The walls grow higher.

What was said and repeating,
And saying it again, repeating
A fire storm of insults and pleas
Begging to keep it up


For no one wants to shoot the last breath.

Something so well known, it shakes man’s soft core.
Duality of man makes us wonder,
If not but nothing has been done before

Though mysteries and superstitions roar
Life and death cause us all such a blunder,
Something so well known, it shakes man’s soft core.

As time moves in one circle, such a bore
I see duality go asunder
If not but nothing, has been done before

Like a philosopher I reach, I soar,
In search of something way over yonder
Something, so well known, it shakes man’s soft core

The duality of man is a war
One of unending battle and plunder.
If not but nothing has been done before

And now I slumber dreaming something more
Awoken by a clap of harsh thunder
Something so well known it shakes man’s soft core
If not but nothing has been done before

Every dim-lit day,
There is a cracked window
That I pass on my way,
That emits a soft glow.

It's always in the corner of my eye
It's not my business though.
I'm sure you'd see the rain
In the season of the snow

As days to weeks,
And weeks to years,
As time makes me weak,
They begin to grow: fears

What could be inside,
That emits such a light?
I'd like to say it makes my eyes wide,
But that's simply not right

If I'd stop I would be late
To what is unknown,
And i don't wish to berate
Will I find a house of bones?

Something inviting
Something dreary
Something homely
Something weary

When lust for life is swelling
As my money collects with time
Soon that dwelling
Will be mine

Something inside senses change
And as if a slap to the face
The house begins something strange
It twists and contorts as if it isnt in the right place

The seething rage
Boils my blood
At the sight of this seeming cage
Walking by in my shoes stained in mud

Sometimes the light glows bright
Like a crackling fire in a cave,
Sometimes it isnt even in my sight
Right away at least. I still cant be brave

Enough to turn to look inside.
As I approach early in the night,
I see a "For Sale" sign and I stand, petrified,
Standing there, getting bumped, left and right

I finally have it,
Though I haven't looked in
And I can hardly sit
I have to find the room it is in

And sometime later, I give up
And realize I want more
Than what is in my cup.
I still feel poor

Yet I throw a party, something grand
Seven days too long
I sit in slump, hoping the band
Plays on

I sit alone but not in silence
I hear the light calling to me
As if to give me guidance
Reminding it all started from an apple tree

I follow it to a wall and smell
The scent of fire
And the sound of a bell
My dinner looks something dire

The wall it opened upon my return
It showed me something cursed
And so I let it burn.
I closed the door and it faded away at first

Then a few moments later, a fire burst
It blew away the wall like dust
As i ran from the house
Passerbys glanced at me with disgust

After fire crews diminished the flame
And the crackle of embers was all that's left
All that was left was the window frame.
While looking in, I watch the glow fade to death

Whilst laying under the baroque
I spotted a looming oak,
One so out of place
It screamed out to my face,
It seemed surreal
Sitting there talking out
But somehow its goal was to conceal
Yet I couldn’t figure out what about,
Two dreary tears fell in my eyes
For the painting has cries
Cries of joy and fear,
Though using its tear
I saw a magical moving picture
It threw me to my knees
As if it wants this scripture;
For in a forest of trees
Lies both life
With strife
And death
To be without breath

Sundaes at sunset
Made me realize just how much I
Flutter at the sight of your perfect brown eyes

Don't let them fade

Soft silky complexion
Stays healthy in your dying moments
Facing it daily

Please don't fade away

Something says to
Never let these days die

They say perfect people
Don't exist
And I know you're not
But to me you are
And just as I realized
That,
That thing in my heart,
You told me
Something that made me lose my grip on reality

It's been a while since we've met
Good ol' keyboard
I know I've been neglecting you
But I've missed you
Almost as much as I've missed myself

The only question is
"Why?"
The only question I have
Is "why?"
"Why am I"
"Why can't I"
"Why do I"
"Why should I"
"Why..."
Just,
"Why"

No longer sleeping
He sits awake in a forest of dreams
Shrouded in darkness
No more light to his path
He holds onto his pillow
Surrounded by the demons that haunt him
No longer knowing what is real and not
He clenches the pillow to ignore the pit in him
Suffering silently slipping off the edge

I don't know if i have anything more to talk about
I have come to terms with everything in my life including
Myself
Now what do I do

From the day I met you
I knew that you 'd forever haunt me
I also knew what you'd be before you knew
I have a weird superpower to predict the future
Upon first contact
Little did I know that it would be my fault
I don't blame you for hating me
But
Know this
I don't even remember your face anymore

Ripped jeans are holy
For the memories they induce are priceless
It's time to listen to our souls
For each one has a story to tell

Lost dazed and confused
I don't know what to do
A brisk breeze blows me in the direction I need to go
I'm being torn apart
But not how I'm used to
We talk nearly enough but we still love each other
You're not toying with me
But you're torturing me
Burying me in concrete to my eyes and filling my heart
I finally understand exactly what I need
And you can't give it to me
Just like a spring wind
Is still cold
You are stuck in one place
While I'm moving on forward

Let's walk together
Down South Main Street
A place of lunch and movies
A place of music and beauty
A place to dance and be alive
Somewhere to jump and jive
Let's be lovers down South Main Street
Without a care in the world
Proving to others our undying
Gratitude
Inspiring ourselves and others
Let's grab lunch on South Main Street
Down by the plaza
Dinner by the square and stargaze
In the park
Let's be lovers on South Main Street

Tock Tock Tock Tock,
The clock Ticks on
As I sit and lie in my wake
Of silence that has grown attached to my ears
I start to leave and everything brings me back
Yet peace pulls me away,
I want myself,
I am burdened to listen to the drawl of time
I am upside-down and inside-out on my futon
Figuring out how to fish in an empty pond for
Anything
But nothing happens, nothing said
Nothing lost
Nothing found
Just
an empty pond
to Slaughter Time with

Close your eyes
Let your day dream be our world
See the storm clouds brewing
Desensitize yourself as we eat at you
Tilt your head down and view the world from the clouds
Reel it back and behold the heavens
Deep in the embers of your
Day dream

1 part Patron
2 parts Lemonade
3 parts summer

Lemonade, fresh squeezed
Brown sugar sweetener
Cubed ice
Paper cups
All a summer's dream

Get you a moon, and the stars will never shine quite as bright
Get you a star and the moon will never shine in your eyes

A blanket of great green grass
Fills the child inside with love,
Wishing for a wish to be granted
Under soft smooth skies
Of baby blue and jet streams of white,
Hoping to fly away with the air currents
And be blown away by soft soothing sayings
Said under shade of passing by drifters so high;
Our heads can barely fathom
Our hands can hardly touch
Our eyes can barely see
Our hearts can hardly feel
Just from lying over blankets of green grass now blue

I keep myself busy
While thinking of you
I don't rightly know why
But I think I love you

Everyday I want to learn something new
about the way you love me
But the way I love you is quite simple
The stars in your eyes shine brightly
My hands are always cold, except while holding yours
And your cute dimple only shows up when I make you laugh
Not to mention that adorable laugh and snort when I say a good one
But my favourite thing, is that I get to love you
How I want to love you
And you still know I love you

She lives through her words
So carefully placed
Without them she would be faceless
And I think that makes her beautiful
That she has found her identity
Because I'm still working on mine

They say
"You don't have the experience to be a poet."
"Don't even try."
"You may have talent, but nothing to nurture it with."
"You're. Just. A. Kid."
But being a kid
I have a better imagination
I can create better visuals
And stimulate senses better
Like soft serve on a softer summer day
Or the crumbling of a stone statue heart stuck on a girl
I am just as good at you
Though I lack experience
I can be better than you

Flowers of so many flowers all meaning
Different things,
Tulips: cheerfulness, royalty and forgiveness
Roses: Love and lust
Buttercups: childishness
But favourite of all
Hydrangeas: Heartfelt gratefulness

Somber slow
Deep
Breaths bring bleak
Thoughts to
Compensate choreographed
Flaws flowing for future figures

The truth touches tongues
Silencing secrets simply structured
In intimate interjections

A man of few words knows fewer problems

I am of death
Blessed is the one who accepts me without question
Blindly follow truth as all things return to me
Be calm as time moves on
Don't be blue or red
Your fate has come back for you, walk on with out dread

I am of life
Doomed from the start, acceptance is not a reality one wants
Safely hold onto the walls of uncertainty
Safety is but a white lie
Lying in wait for a truly blue moon
We are but agents of fate

It started out as two
Just a couple to climb my hill
When a warm wind blew the ice away
And that's all it was for a few rotations

Then the couple, just the two
Turned into three, now just a few
Boy was he loud
Not long after it was just two, that's okay
Little did I know it was gonna be a trio again

As some time passed it became four
But one never left my root's side
"Odd" I thought
I decided to nurture it, now it is with me forever
The situation is always changing

I have housed mice and birds
Snakes and cats
And now
Humans

But as they age, so do I
I know they all love me and my hill
Sometimes they just come to hide

I've never been lonely
they always come back, but now I hold two
And three come back

Alas I'm growing old and my own children
Have only just taken root and a third lies with us, but only one
comes back to us, my children and I

It seems I can't give them up, although they lie still
I can't imagine the same fate
None come to visit

****** and burnt out
A match without a sulfur tip
A pack of meat left out for the coyotes

The green mile
Is the longest when
I am with you
Hand in hand

Charcoal smoked ideas
Blackened by the idea of
Sickened hearts

Yet when i greet you with a smile
It patches all the holes in our boat

Muddied shirts and shoes
From playing my the river of life

Sometimes silence is the best answer
To the hardship and strife
Sometimes Silence is the best answer to
Sitting under the shade on a hot summer day
On a hill overlooking the airstrips
Listening to the ballads of
Those beautiful flying airships landing abruptly

Not quite as... oh whats the word?
Forget it let me
Eat up this moment
And savor it for the delicate flavor it has
The moment i mean

So let us enjoy this glorious moment
Before you divellicate my heart

What's left to say