The first time my heart was broken,
I thought I was through.
I swore I’d never love again,
until I found you.
You are the one who makes me complete,
the one I think about everyday.
Every time I’m near you,
I start falling in more than one way.
You may not know this,
but you’ve always had my heart.
I just wanted you to know,
that I’ve loved you from the start.
You make my heart beat faster,
with every breath I take.
I know I’m in love with you,
Trust me, this is not fake.
The first time I fell in love,
She ripped my heart in two.
Forgive me if I seem scared,
I just don’t want to lose you.
The first time my heart was broken,
I thought I was through.
I swore I’d never love again,
until I found you…

I don't remember, any more,
The exact shape of your hands
As I held them in mine,
Caressed them,
Memorized the length of your fingers,
The depth of your calluses.

I don't remember, any more,
Exactly your height, how much
Taller than me
You were, where
My head rested on your chest
When you held me tightly close.

I don't remember, any more,
Your scent, when we lay together
Creating our own
Magic rhythm,
Matching our heartbeats as we
Touched the sky, together.

I don't remember, any more,
The sound of your voice, calling
My name as though
It were a song
Within itself, a precious treasure
You valued with all your being.

And I don't remember, any more,
The color of your eyes, the shape
Of your lips,
Only...
How your eyes crinkled at the corners
And your laugh, as you told me,

"I love you."

On a train
Where no one cares where I go
On a platform
You somehow reach me against the odds
We quarrel, we fight, until exhaustion
And the moment of my freedom
Just happens to be your moment of self
Moment of salt
And I bleed tears
Knowing the timing
It’s always the right time for tragedy
My tragedy
Your weekly release
Of salt
Takes a lot, I know
But it’s not enough
It’s not
What’s under the belt
It’s what’s under the skin
That you can’t ever
Understand
Understand
What’s another word for
Understand

Tumor bloom
Tumor grew
Tumor who
Rumors flew
Tumor removed
Tumor who
We still can’t figure out what is wrong with you
And you can’t raise your hand in a test tube
Bloated yellow belly on hands of blue
Investigate through shaky fingers, how dare you
It’s only our job to watch you
Watch you fade away, cry at your funeral
An through sobs of joy, claim we were there for you
Are you still with Us?
Are you still with Us?
Well here’s another object we can put a piece of your soul in
Chock full of nothing at the bottom of the ocean
-----
Well, I only stuck around to hear the details from your mouth
Perhaps to share some with you, but you never asked, you assumed
Just like I did when he told me he did it with a smug, smug grin
Just like I did when I returned to my body with plastic near every inch
Guilty by the first, but I swear I wasn’t there for the rest
Take a dose by ten, wash it down with tainted gin, let’s see how well you land
I wanna see how well your body lands
And all this I’ve gathered through a hell made up of your eyes
Didn’t have the luxury of tape to ease my long-gone mind
There were some things to repress, long before this
I’ve pried open every vault, to find this wasn’t one of them
No, this wasn’t one of them
And your spies, my friends, were your spies
Who are you this time
And my friends, were your spies
So I divulged the icing with a glazed smile
Yeah I divulged nothing, but I tried
I tried
Closing my eyes I see your future objects
An one day you’ll be under the curtain
Yes, one day you’ll be under the curtain
Observed, abducted, catatonic, fried
This world hates absolution
When I’m gone
Maybe a ghost can jog my memory
That was too much for you to do
----
Tumor bloom
Tumor grew
Rumors flew
Tumor removed
Tumor who?
Tumor who?

In School
In a pool of cliches
I meant to define myself
I meant to stand out without trying
I meant to excel
But without that skill
You simply rebel
Or repel
Laws of attraction
Simple, really
They preach us to learn
But really they meant
"Know how to burn"
Classy, lightly, a flicker
Don't fade out
Last till you're blue
When you're blue
Wait till the burn-out
Don't wet your naive fingers
Even if it takes a million years
That or take an occupation
A job
(More like Job)
Endure your suffering
Put air into a dead corpse
Celebrate Columbus day
Know your atoms
Twenty-six times none is Eight
And it flows and flows
But they don't show you
The importance of rivers
They don't show you
The importance of clouds
They don't show you
The importance of being shrouded
In an aura all your own
They just show you how to blend
Mix of wool an apartheid
Don't blend, just weave
Breathe in, breathe out
That's all you're made to do
Breathe in, breathe out
And be happy to die
Just be happy to die

A Familiar Wound

The doctors slit your belly
To get to your spine
And cushion the disks
That slipped from you
Like soapy plates
From frail worn hands.

I was ten when you asked me
To wipe the stitched opening
With swabs and gauze
and to make sure that
The staples would not pop
From their place, exposing you.

I bent down next to you,
My knees denting craters
Into the carpet, and cleaned off
The stapled wound running
Perpendicular to the scar
That opened up years before
To place me in your arms and hear you
Whisper my name into being.

The pills slurred your words,
Your tongue undulating lazily
Heavily weighted in your mouth,
Rolling out gracias mijo
And I blushed, realizing
What a small gesture this was
Nursing the same belly
That held me inside years ago.

why should i remember
to call you papi
or say te amo
when you can barely
remember my name

Eve is tempted

Honey voiced sooth sayer
Speaks like seraphim do
Curling itself amongst branches,
Undulating body throughout leaves
And amongst stars slips its tongue
Into her ear as she sleeps
Making her itch for something,
Making her miss what she does not know.

Apples           Apples             Apples
She dreams of her fingers lacing around
Red shiny skin,
Her teeth picking at its' flesh

Apples

They haunt her, and a snake
Calls her to its branched haven
And her tongue is at a loss
To voice what she does not know.