Some things have to happen,
Some days have to be terrible,
Not because you deserve them,
Or want them,
Because those days lead you
to the days that you do deserve,
and you do want,
They teach,
You learn,
And most importantly..
You appreciate.

You know me,
I just fall to easily,
I met you and never looked back,
I fell in love with you fast,
I've been that way since,
I know I'm not easy to love,
But stand by me,
You're all I want to hold.

Failure's a bitter pill to swallow,
Life hits a spore spot,
But if you believe we can do this,
I'll believe in you;

Sometimes I want to call it a day,
I want to go our separate ways,
But then you tell me how we're right,
And I don't want to leave;

We're ****** if we do,
We're ****** if we don't,
That's a part of this game we play,
But I'm the best player you'll ever take.

Let's throw in the towel,
And go on our way,
You know I love you,
But you know I won't stay..

Was this really the last time,
If it is I don't want out of this bed,
I don't think you want this either,
We just aren't making sense,
We're having one of our bad nights,
We're both just hurting a little to much,
Let's just stay quite,
Hold me tight like you used to,
I'm not letting go of you,
I always feel a little to much love for you,
I'm always scared to lose you,
Without you, what am I?
Just half a person,
A empty hand,
All these spaces in between my fingers,
My brains going a million different ways,
I want you here babe,
So please stay.

Just a casual conversation,
Between a few friends,
Your name came up,
I don't know how,
I guess I blacked out,
They ask me if that was someone I knew,
Was I suppose to tell the truth?
I couldn't stop my heart from weeping,
I felt the raw pain in my throat,
I replied in a bit if a sob,
and in my last breath I cried,
I used to.

If you don't mind,
And you don't take it personally,
Next time we see each other,
Could we just ignore each other.
If it was up to me,
We would still be together,
But the past memories when you brush by,
They take me away,
So if you don't mind,
Don't say "Hey",
Or look at me with those deep blue eyes,
Trying to start a conversation,
About how we keep going on with our lives,
But we both know,
That this separation is painful,
And this speaking isn't making it better,
Time always pulls us back together,
So that's it,
Can we just be strangers again.

Hey it's me again,
I heard you knock,
I'm letting you in,
Try not to be to shocked or floored,
I'm just trying to find what's living for,
And if it's me and you talking positively,
I'll just say I haven't found it yet,
But I doubt I'll find it at all,
I've never been good at finding the lost,
I'll leave that one up to God,
Because Lord knows I'm not good enough to do this on my own,
That's why I don't even try,
I dig holes so deep,
That the The Great Wall of China is just a jump into the dark,
I guess what I'm getting around to say is,
I'm not interested,
Have a nice day.

I don't talk to stranger,
but they speak to me,
I tell them to stop it,
but they don't listen to me;

I don't follow strangers,
but they follow me,
I run away from them,
but they keep following me;

I don't believe strangers,
but they still tell me things,
I tell them to leave,
but they argue with me;

I don't live with strangers,
but they live with me,
they're always in my head,
telling me things.

I don't share my head with strangers,
but they're in there still,
I tell them to stop influencing me,
but they won't listen to me.

It's been three weeks,
I'm an antidepressant away from being okay with this,
I'm just numbing the pain,
I'm tired of feeling this way,
The worst part is, you just don't understand,
You think I'm being dramatic,
But that didn't keep me from wanting to jump in front of a train,
It's whatever though,
I just want to go,
And you'll never know until I'm gone,
That you actually gave a ****.

You don't see,
Everyone loves you,
They love you,
He loves you,
She loves you,
But most importantly I love you,
And you never see that,
You're to busy looking for someone who doesn't exist,
It's all an act,
You're so scared of being hurt,
But I can make promises, that they won't.
All those other women,
They didn't wait for you like I have,
They didn't try anything just to make you smile,
and try to comfort you in your darkest moments.
I wish you'd just open your eyes and see me,
Not the friend your so close to,
But open your eyes to a woman,
A woman who's been standing here loving you
ever since I met you,
Don't be afraid,
My love doesn't fade,
I'll be here forever,
I can't help it,
I couldn't leave if I tried,
Without you my pieces are broken,
I'm lost in this world,
Maybe you'll never realize,
and I'll be watching from the outside,
I'm just waiting for you to love me,
Like I've always loved you.

How long will it take,
How long will you be used,
You toss every hurt word aside,
When will I not be the only one on your side,
Will your tears ever dry,
From where he knocks you down each time,
When will you say it's enough,
When will you walk away from it all,
When will you say it's not okay,
How will you heal,
When he continues to make new wounds,
When will you leave this all,
Sorry for this cruel truth,
The cruel truth about you.

What do you want me to say?
Oh I'm fine, yeah I'll be okay.
I'm not depressed
I don't have a reason why,
If you tell me not to be sad,
I guess I'll try.
I guess I won't sit up all night,
I guess I won't tear up or cry,
Because you told me not to, right?
I'm not depressed,
But I am and you don't mind.

I smoked a cigarette,
I took my inhaler,
I argued with my dog,
I took him out to ***;
Oh the glamour of my life,
What a person I choose to be;

I slipped in the shower,
I got soap in my eyes,
I have a bruise on my shoulder,
I got cut on my thigh,
Oh how nice is the high life,
but a web I weave;

I burnt my breakfast,
I had a drink,
My house caught on fire,
I watched it flame,
Oh how hot this life is,
What a light I see;

Me, on my pedestal,
Me, high on life,
Me, with my high expectations,
Me, taking flight,
Oh what a life I life,
What a person I choose to be,
What a fool I am,
What a fool I like to be.

It was so easy back then,
I didn't have a care in the world,
I didn't care who I hurt,
I had no concern for who I broke,
The world shifted for me,
You put everything in perspective,
You changed everything.
It's really quite scary,
To feel this way,
For once I felt whole,
I knew I'd never be the same after that day,
You see, When you find that missing piece,
You want to glue that piece into your puzzle,
Because without you (my piece),
I'm just half a picture,
And no matter who tries to paint or draw,
No matter who tried to morph into the shape,
It just wasn't the same,
Not like you fitting,
Not like you being with me.

I don't think you fully understand,
How cold I was,
I didn't know how to love,
I didn't know how to accept love,
Somehow I changed,
I'm different now,
I don't care about another drink,
Any other man,
Because with you something's different,
I knew,
The whole time,
I knew,
When you spoke my name,
It wasn't you just calling to me,
It was a sign from the soul,
It was like a song to my heart,
No one had ever made it that close to my heart.

Most of the time I don't even know how you do it,
The way you nurture me when I need it,
The way you give the good,
The way you take the bad,
You're selfless when it comes to me,
You're not scared to hurt my feelings,
Yet, you never aim to hurt,
You're graceful and tact when you speak,
I would of gave up on me,
I would of left my pretty little *** in the dust,
But not you,
You're the knot on my rope,
I love you too much.

He held her while she shook; violently, terrified.
When the shaking ceased she stood still as stone, and waited for the tears to fall,
but when the tears didn’t fall,
and the earth began to shift she walked on.
Pushing the arms that had held her through the fight, she pushed forward as her world fell back.
The darkness grew and the cold became bitter, and she walked on alone,
because lonely was all she ever knew.

Let's make a bet,
I bet this won't last,
I'll try to give you everything you've never had,
I'll go on about giving my heart away,
But at the end of the day I won't cry,
I won't care at all,
It'll be like I never fell hard,
That's probably cause I never did,
You're just another name on my list.

It's been a while since I've been here,
I regret every time I do,
Gaining and loses pieces,
It's a game you don't want to play,
If you ever do, you'll feel as I do,
I fill the spaces,
Take my time with the glue,
Nothing feels quite like you,
I wonder if you'll ever let me get put together,
You like to watch me come unglued,
Yet it hurts so good when you do.

Forgive me Father; for I have sinned,
Look what I just did again,
Give me grace to let them in;
What I monster I've became,
I can hardly live this way,
I struggle everyday,
Is this the way it was suppose to be;

Wish I could just skip rocks and play make-believe,
Reality's tearing away every unbroken piece,
No way to get some inner peace;

Everybody stay away
Your not safe with me this way,
I have no boundaries no regrets,
No hope for turning back;

Life it to real to stand her comfortably,
So mentally I'm ****** up,
all these doors shut,
But nobody cares,
I'm not any one anymore;

Daddy's gone,
And Momma's getting there,
I can barely look at myself in the mirror,
My image just keeps getting clearer,
What I never wanted to be,
Is all I ever see;

The hate just eats away at me,
There's no escaping for me,
I'm the monster they created,
Father forgive me Father for I have sinned.

My words sharpened by my tongue,
Reach out and cut you,
With every intention to tear you apart,
I was cold,
You have frost bite,
I didn't think,
I just took everything you had left,
I was cruel,
I meant every word,
But in my best moments I don't,
Now you're mad,
What did I expect,
Why am I hurt,
When I was the one who caused this,
You just got the receiving end,
You have the right to play victim,
I'm the monster tonight.

Contrary to your belief,
And unlike whatever you think,
I don't regret our time,
And if we're making confessions,
I'll go ahead and make mine,
That your the only thing I got right.

I'll admit I think back,
I'll admit I miss you,
And sometimes I wonder,
Pondering my thoughts,
I know the truth,
I couldn't hate you,
Even if I tried to;

I know you regret us,
I know you want to take it all back,
But I'll treasure that time,
That year of my life,
That belonged to you,
The one year,
I got something right.

You could slap me across the face,
Knock me to the floor,
Scream into my ear,
Say things that strikes me right to the core,
And all I would do,
Is just stand up and thank you for your time.

It's been a long few weeks,
Smoking cigarettes waiting to suffocate,
Drinking every night,
I guess I really am Daddy's little girl,
I've got all his tendencies,
I just do what I've got to do,
I've been in a really dark place,
Where lights can't touch the sea,
I can barely hear the crowd say my name,
Am I awake, am I conscious,
Working everyday,
Telling all my coworkers, that I'm okay,
Really I just want a shot of Jack,
It'll help me sleep,
I don't do much of that these days.

Give me something beautiful,
something beautiful to write.
Something about how the good guys always win,
something about the books we read as children, coming to life.
I need someone to tell me how the prince will come,
and the weather will change it's season this time.
I need a little hope,
I need something to help me feeling inside.

You're going to do great things, You're going to love hard,
You're going to have people screaming your name,
You're going to drink beer and shoot the bull with your friends,
They're going to ask about the girl in your songs,
And for the first time in a long time you'll feel something,
You'll think about me.
Every night after a few drinks, You'll stumble on stage with your cigarette,
Telling your fans, this one goes out to the one who got away,
The one that I should of chased,
The one that has my heart every day,
The one that I fall asleep in the memories,
And on that stage you'll feel the pain,
Of missing me.

Some people you shouldn't have,
And never should you hold them,
Because the thing about those types,
They are the ones that love fast,
The ones that make you fall hard,
The ones you're head over heels about,
But they always slip out in time,
The time before they love you back,
Or even care at all,
It's such a strange design,
You love and hate them,
They consume every inch of your mind,
And you don't even notice,
Cause when you love like that,
Nobody gets out alive.

I want you to greet me,
With open arms,
I want a place to call home,
I know this pain is temporary,
Some day I'll find rest,
I was thrown out into adulthood,
Now I can't get back,
Little girls become women,
The moment men can't be fathers,
I got lost in darkness,
I fell to the ground,
But only to feel where to stand,
I'm a woman now,
I stand on steady legs,
In stilettos high as the sky,
I don't stumble anymore,
I'm planted to the ground,
Doing what daddy never could..

This is our playground baby,
Nobody's coming to save us,
This is the world we created,
We live with the consequences from our choices,
If that's to much to swallow,
Then there's something more wrong with us,
Then we even initially thought,
We lived wildly,
And thought we'd stay free,
I don't know who was more delusional,
You or Me,
Now baby, count for me,
Is this life two or three,
Everything starting to blur,
I can hardly see if it's me in the mirror,
Or another character I created,
Let's ignore all these exit signs,
There's only a road block a few million miles,
We can stay on this road, for now.

Are you okay,
Your breathing hard,
Maybe it's finally all sunk in,
Maybe you're losing your mind,
It's been a hard few months,
But I swear to you, me and you will be fine,
That's just what we do,
When you don't have a choice, you just live,
You do what you have to do,
All you do is fight through,
That's what we know,
Don't be ashamed of that,
We're always the underdogs,
But even the underdogs hit it big sometimes.

I'm skeptical of his intentions,
Yet, he's sure about his feelings,
We've done this before,
We've don't this a million times,
His love for me fails,
Or that's what I believe,
But he hangs around,
waiting for me;

He's faster then I am,
I'm smarter then him though,
He treats me like a fool,
But he loves me foolish ways,
I don't believe what he says,
But I trust what he does,
And he sticks around,
Waiting for me;

I wait for the day,
That he turns away from me,
Going into the arms of another woman,
Who can love him tight,
Kiss him goodnight,
Forever to do what I couldn't,
But still he hangs around,
No matter the weather or time,
Waiting for me

Let me tell you a little story,
About a girl called me,
Who had a broken heart,
That nobody could see,
But she felt it,
So she smiled through it,
Because she didn't want other people to feel it to,
Sometimes a frown is just as contagious as a smile,
Or that was what she thought,
So everyday she fell apart a little more,
All alone,
With people all around,
And nobody saw the pain that shown through her eyes,
Even though it came across so clear,
At the start of every smile,
Her eyes began to water,
And no one had a clue,
How lost she truly was,
Or how bad she really felt,
How every night she laid awake,
Thinking to herself about the past that haunted her,
And no one ever woke her up.

I don't want to wake up without you,
Like I've done so many nights before,
I'm sure you can't hear your phone over the music,
I bet the last thing your thinking about is coming home,
I know you're not worried that I'm here alone,
Or about the sounds that wake me up,
I keep staring at the ceiling,
Waiting for your call,
Wondering who'll drive you home,
I guess I should of known what I was getting into,
I met you at a party after all,
You were the life of the party,
The light in the room,
Everyone just watched at you stumbled around,
I thought you'd change your ways,
I thought you'd love me more,
I was so idiotic for believing it to be true,
I'm curled up with a glass of wine,
It's the only thing to calm my nerves,
And tonight I'm praying hard,
That you'll come home tonight.

I used to cry myself to sleep every night,
While you were only God knows where,
I grasped the sheets,
Cried into my pillow,
And one of the things that hurt the most,
Was knowing,
You weren't thinking about me.
I thought maybe,
Just maybe,
One day I'd be good enough of you,
But you expect perfection,
And that was something I couldn't reach.
I've been the wandering sort lately,
Waiting for the day I'll just wander right into you,
Maybe I'm just wishful thinking,
Or maybe I'm a glutton for punishment,
But I think it comes down to,
Wanting what you can't have,
And you slip through my fingers every time.

Buzz and beeps from machines,
Air pushes in and out,
Your chest moves,
My knees shake;
Yet I try to seem steady.
There's a rawness in my throat,
A hole in my belly,
I feel as though I should just drop to the ground to cry
The nurses look at me with pity,
The doctors glance as they go by,
And there I am;
Watching you die.

Where are the lines drawn in the sand,
All these boundaries were washed away with the tide,
And we're paddling out at sea,
Just trying to stay a float,
We're to afraid to go to the shore,
We're to afraid to stop kicking our feet,
The waves pull us back and forth,
We think we can handle it,
But in our minds somewhere,
We know we can't,
We know we're going to drown,
All because we couldn't make up our minds.

Would you think of me as weak..
If I cried for a moment,
and through those tears tried
my best to smile;
if I bit my lip,
and tried to keep my eyes open,
even if every memory was killing me;
Would you think any less of me..
If I covered my eyes with these bruised hands,
and wiped away the tears;
or if I just walked off,
and tried to pretend like it didn't happen.
I'll tell you the truth,
I'm trying really hard,
but the tears find there way down my cheek,
I can only imagine what you think,
please don't think any less of me,
I'm just trying to get through.
What would you rather me do?

When I met you, I wasn't ready,
I've always been terrible with timing,
You were in a whole other world,
And my feet were still dangling,
I still had all these visions, endless opportunities,
You were so established,
You were so safe.
I wasn't looking for safe though,
It was the opposite.

I was so young,
I thought I'd never get hurt,
I always felt tall, and bullet proof,
And when I was brought down to the right size,
I just bounced back up and headed North to the sky,
At night you said you dreamed of me,
But I was just like the wind,
You felt me, but could never hold me,
Nobody has,
I took pride in belonging to nobody,
Not even myself,
I took the utter most fulfillment in the thought of being free,
Then you followed me,
Trying to tame me,
You never could understand my type,
You just can't make a bird stop wanting to fly,
On the ground I despised you,
In the air, I missed you,
and In my heart I always knew I loved you,
But this time is terrible for me.

It's been a few weeks and the feelings haven't faded,
I was so confident that you'd come around;
I'm not holding on to you because I'm scared for you to leave,
I'm holding on because your the only thing I got right;
Don't make me wake up alone again tonight,
Hoping to be warmed by your touch;
Everything we used to argue about,
Everything we used to do,
I can't accept that your love faded like you said it to,
Believe me when I say, I wish I could stop loving you,
But that's something I'll never be able to do;
It's not your love I'm begging for anymore,
It's every part of you;
If you didn't believe I loved you,
I wouldn't be waiting here for you,
People think I'm crazy,
I'm sure that it's true,
I don't care what people think, I only care about you;
Never have I ever felt the way I feel about you.

I don't think you understand what you're getting into,
You think I'm attractive,
Clever at times,
But you don't know me.
You've heard me converse,
You say I have a cute laugh,
And you say you're ready,
Ready for all the baggage I always seem to bring,
But maybe you should understand,
I've never loved anything,
And you won't change anything..
Maybe you should think twice,
Take the hint and run,
I'm so lost in this world,
That there's no sight of the road,
This is for your own good,
You don't know what I've been through,
So maybe it's best if you take the warning and leave,
You don't know me.

The love I was searching for,
The hands I wanted to hold,
Every moment that passed by,
Every comment I made,
It didn't mean anything,
After the day that you found me.

Dear Darling,
Where ever you might be,
I want to make things right,
I just don’t know how too,
I feel this is for the best,
But the thought of leaving is cutting me wide open,
When I told you I love you I meant it,
I’m trying to save you from the pain,
Because I’m no good for you,
I’m not even good for myself,
I’m one foot in the grave, the other foot's out the door,
I don’t have the power anymore,
I can’t do this to you,
I love you to much,
This is your rescue letter,
Don’t wonder where I am,
Where you are I’ll be,
In the whispers of the wind,
Through the shaking of trees,
When you look up at the stars,
I’m always where you are,
I love you to much to hurt you,
So please don’t wonder where I am,
I’m always right where you stand,
Don't hurt.