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Portland Grace Aug 2014
Pigment shaded
I'm in the light now,
out of the dusty room
dark circles beneath bright eyes
pale skin
I think I became
luminous?
I felt like I was melting.
So sure,
everything was okay.
I wasn't okay,
and neither were you.

I'm in the light now,
it's hot here,
but the desert burned away
my doubts.
I'm cleansed again,
and all of my freckles
are returning to me,
lining my nose
there's roses in my cheeks.
I feel like a child again.
Portland Grace Aug 2014
I'm so happy,
here in the heat
away from all the things
that remind me of you.
*(but some things still do)
Portland Grace Jul 2014
Stuck on the puzzle,
I would hang myself up for weeks
searching.

Where is the last place you heard me sing?
I forgot how exactly
that one tune goes.
but when I turn around,
I can almost hear
you hum it.

I was told to stop
looking back
I will **** myself,
if I grovel in the past.

Nights have always been rough
I'm scared you see,
darkness
It's like I am still a child

I peek out my windows
turn on my nightlight
bury myself in your shoulders,
but where are you?

Stuck on the puzzle,
looking for the missing piece,
but you weren't it
you never were.
Portland Grace Jul 2014
Side by side,
me and you
whispers
of the stuff
we are going to do.

Side by side
you and I,
sleepless nights,
morning rides,
You be my Bonnie,
I'm your Clyde.
There's so much stuff
and such small time.

We'll walk down piers,
to ocean tides
just you and me
side by side

We'll go to Italy,
and Japan and Spain
we'll cross the world
all the same,
hand in hand
you and me,
Everything is meant to be.

Days turned to months,
and soon to years,
and I love you even more right here.

Tomorrow is early,
tonight is late,
I won't say forever,
I won't say fate.
But I'm off soon,
my dearest, my love
my little spoon,
my little bug.

I wouldn't make you any promise
I couldn't keep,
I can't promise you kisses
next week,
two weeks
eight weeks,

Side by side,
you and me
exactly where I want to be.

so when I'm leaving
six weeks away,
remember my kisses
and how I wished I could stay.
And count on your fingers
and all ten of your toes
all the stuff that we did
all the places,
we still have to go.
Portland Grace Jun 2014
You used to ask me why I never wrote about you,
or for you.
I wrote about him,
poem after poem,
about his mouth
his hands,
his solitude.

I never wrote about you,
because I didn't have to,
you were there beside me,
held my hand when I felt
underground.
I notice,
words come easier
when no one is around.

So here's your poem,
thank you,
for staying by me,
thank you
for not giving me
words to write about.

But I've already
spoken word poems
to you sleepy head
every morning
when I tell you,
I love you
I really do.
Portland Grace Jun 2014
Words can save,
be saved
stuck in little glass jars,
keep-sake of last winters blues.

Whispered into a pillow,
swallowed after June.
Words follow like a shadow,
box them up,
dust collectors on your top shelf,
they will fall on you
when you reach for something too high.

Words are water, air, earth
drowning in I'm sorry
floating on I love you
buried by goodbye.

Words on post cards
spoke here
kissed onto pages
stamped
it never took a step
lost in translation

Words will keep you safe,
tuck you in at night
kiss you on the forehead
you're all alone.

Words are falling
rain,
rivers,
I am swimming
in the way you told me
how my skin felt

words save,
put your seat belt on
can be saved
I love you from here to here
Little glass jars
I don't want to die any more
Last winters blues
*You've started smiling again
Portland Grace May 2014
Acid-washed,
sipping in the summer
of your grit eroded
hands,

not a mans hands,
not worn with work
but plastic knobs,

you are a boy still,
with boyish hands
and narrow hips
and a selfishness
I can taste in your kiss.
(It's still just as sweet)

Resurrect me,
time-out,
save game data
pause.

You smell like winter blues,
old-west movies
and soft skin.
You're the only home I've ever known.

Pick-axe,
Zhonya's Hourglass,
Feral Flare,
Level-up

Max-level
let's platinum
I'm not ready
to give you up yet

*(I leave in less than three months and I don't know what I'm going to do without you. I love you so much)
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