I'm so tired of this.
This overwhelming sadness and frustration.
Self destruction is what I'm best at.
I hate myself more than
Anyone could hate me.
I stare into mirrors,
And I criticize and pick out
Every stupid flaw.
That's why I'm afraid of mirrors,
They show me in my worst state.
I thought leaving that **** town
Would change everything.
But here I am,
Wallowing in self pity
And despising every inch of myself.
Being by myself allows the
Voices to grow louder
Until they are screaming and
I'm screaming right back.
I  hate this so much.
Its an effort to do the dishes.
Its an effort to do anything.
This is me in my worst state.
*So why are you still here?