I couldn’t tell you why you matter to me
But you do.

For when you smile in my direction
My heart hurts in a good way.
But when I turn around and see
That your smile is intended for another
My heart hurts differently.

I want to tell you why you matter to me,
But the words I’m searching for do not exist.
For many words exist to describe a feeling,
But my feelings for you cannot be found in them.

And then I wonder if this feeling for you exists,
For how can something exist that cannot be described?

And while this question runs through my head
You pass by.
And while I wrestle my heart to stay in my chest,
You smile in my direction.

So I smile in yours,
Praying
there is no one behind me.