my father is always talking, lecturing
i just get quiet like a little girl and i listen
majority of the time i have no idea what he's talking about
so i just listen
i start thinking had i grown up with him how would my life be different?
would i have ever been homeless?
would i have had four kids?
and would i have trouble making poor man decisions?
i'm not ashamed of my truth
i know i have daddy issues
but i think it's where i go from here that will make me resilient
i used to pride myself on not needing validity
but as i dig a little deeper i come to see
more of that heavy murky stuff that's deep inside of me