this is the first time I've been able to write about you in a year, and hurts more with every character that I type. you used to bring me joy and happiness, and now you bring me feelings of sorrow, pain, anxiety and depression. i'm still trying to figure out how that is possible, especially coming from you. when we were still together, I used to lie awake at 4AM thinking about how much I love you, and how much it would hurt to lose you. i used to dream of owning a beautiful home on the lake with you, and every morning, I could roll over either way and see a beautiful sight. on my left; a glistening lake on my right; the love of my life now, I lie awake at 2AM wondering what went wrong and how much I miss you. quite a transition, isn't it?