It felt good at first
The way he picked me up, swung me around and kissed me goodbye.
His hands almost froze off but he didn’t care because they were holding mine.
He would always watch me instead of the movie
He made me feel unbreakable and happy
Things I hadn’t felt in ages

I counted 4 times
4 times he repeated “I like you”
Making sure I knew just how fond he had grown of me
I fell for him so hard that getting back up seemed impossible.
But it was those endless moments we spent staring into each others eyes
and the way he’d run his fingers through my hair,
That felt good at first.

It all came crashing down so fast
Suddenly his lips weren’t made for mine anymore
He chose impulse over devotion
Sticking with what he knows rather than discovering something new
Leaving me behind to pick up the pieces of my broken heart scattered on the bedroom floor.
He played me all along
He knowingly put me through hell and got off on it
Yet I still sit here missing him, missing the person that I thought he was.
I want him to stay up all night to watch the sunrise with me again
I want to get lost in his eyes just one more time.
I want him to look at me the way he did, like I was the only girl in the world and he’d never leave my side.
All I want
Is for him to love me.
But he loves her.

Seeing him everyday reminded me of it all.
Those split seconds I lock eyes with him, created a tornado of memories in my mind.
Good and bad
Making my knees weak and my heart sink
Breakdown after breakdown,
Thinking it’d never end.
But now he's just a blurred figure in the halls,  
A memory locked away in the back of my mind never to be opened again.