I prefer classical music
On days when I'm feeling numb
The exquisiteness of it all
Breathes fire into my soul
Slowly bringing me back
From an unending abyss
Until I feel almost human again

There are times
When I seem to be consumed
By an utter sadness
That not even I can write about

Should I explain?

I like to light cigarettes
Only to watch them burn away
Gradually turning into bits of ash
I miss their taste
And it's only then that I realize
That I don't drink enough
It's another weakness I'm not allowed

These days,
Pride seems to be my only salvation
Or perhaps it's stubbornness
A sheer force of will to get through the day

Either way,
Dreams remain pain filled
Life is a constant fight against the bleak
And I break mirrors every day
Cracking my reflection with ease
To fragment this forced smile
It's a necessary evil...
To hide everything that I feel
Because surviving is the only thing that matters

To be honest,
Happiness is something I can't touch
An emotion that I can't quite fathom
Though I can't seem to stop trying

Every jungle needs a queen
I'll be ****** if it isn't me

© 2014 Peach