I jumped right in the deep end and came out gasping for air
Resting on the poolside; my suit clinging to the rise and fall of my stomach
Impatiently I wait for my normal breathing pattern to return
But my lungs are simply refusing to co-operate
I feel like if I sit on the side of the pool for too long I will forget how to swim
Unsure if whether to just dive right in again and kick my legs as fast as my heart races
I drum my fingers on the cold, ceramic surface and wiggle my toes in the water
Staying even after pool closing time
I might drink another glass of wine just to warm my insides
Pretending like I don't know how long it's been
6 weeks yesterday – 6 weeks and a day, today
My mind fuzzy like static off a TV screen
Wanting, not, to spend my life on mute
But my screams only escape my mouth as whispers
Or as songs that once used to belong to us
The songs that filled the intervals of your play