I am at the edge of this cliff. Staring down at what could be my death for certain if I am to jump. I stare down at the river following the chromium streams meeting my eyes with your own. Seeing your smiling face. Eyes sparkling bright. Smiling all the way to your kind eyes. Waving your strong hands. Calling me forth to you.
I Swallow Deep. Palms Sweaty. Step Back. Bite my tongue. Squeeze my eyes closed. Shut tight. All I can see is you. Your friendly smile. Your strong arms.
And I leap. Leap Hard. Leap Strong.
And I fall.
I can feel the wind whipping through my hair. Past my Ears. All around me. Swallowing me up. Screaming in my ears. Making me ever so aware. Of My Mortality. My Fragile Heart..
The wind whips faster. My Heart Beats Louder.
I'm Spinning. Turning. Flailing. Like a ragdoll Thrashing through the wind. At the elements' mercy. Pushing and Pulling. Shoving and Tugging. Throughout the air. But all I can do. Is Squeeze my eyes tighter. Breathe a little deeper. Think of your smile. Your Sanctuary Arms.
And before I can understand what has happened I've plunged deep. I finally open my eyes. Peering all around. Where I am. Where I've broken my fall.
Am I gone? No longer with the living soulds. Why? Why do I feel stifled and suffocated? I look around. I stop at light. I push myself towards it. Unsure of how I'm moving or Even what direction I'm migrating towards. But, nonetheless, moving. To the Light. To the Warmth. Just as I don't know if my fragile being could stand it anymore. I break the surface.
I breathe deep. I'm alive. I'm breathing.
But you. You are no where to be found. I silently scream your name. Searching. Peering around. I search and search. Shaking. Quivering. Fearing what reality has brought to me.
I scream and yell. Searching still. All Day. All Night. Til my fight is gone. My search ceases. Grief sets in. The heart breaks. And I am alone.
So, I sit down in the quietest meadow. And weep. Then, the weeping ceases. The screams begin again. Anger and Rage Now. Then, the screams, too, go silent.
And I lie down and Stare at the sky. Looking at the stars. Listening to the water's whisper. Feeling the silken grass against my back.
Breathing. Quivering. Accepting.
Being alone in the meadow. But enjoying all that is left. All that is bequeathed to me. The meadow that is peace.
The only solace to the shattered mess that is My Heart. My Mind. My Soul.
But the waters whisper comfort. The Stars show light, in this time, Dark as Onyx. Tracing the lines on my skin. With the soft comforts of this meadow within a valley.