Everyone in town knows
That Philmon is a mad scientist
It's not his little hunchback buddy
Or the crazy smocks in which he's dressed

It's not the thunder clouds that hang over his house
Or the strange sounds which from his basement grew
No, it's not any of those things
That gives the town it's clue

It's not all of the dark birds
That hang out on his fence
Or his subscription to weird science weekly
And all those wild experiments

Not even when things turn up missing
Down at the local graveyard
No, it's the HONK" if you love Mad Scientists sticker
On the bumper of his car