1.
And I wish it never ended but I moreso wish you were different.
Thinking back, I may be the one that messed things up for good one too many times and the one who clinged too much, nonetheless:
You want to remain close enough to be a passive enemy
You twist the narrative with half truths that ignored my clarification,
How pitiful I must seem now your rosé tints got lifted and situations happened and our differences clashed and outgrew each other in the span of hours with every subsequent problem.
Now you can cry victim and bully without remorse make-pretending I never felt anything for you? Like I
was the heartless one, the one who never loved.
O Romeo where art thou? And why must thou be the seed of my perfect enemy? O well, I know I’ve loved stronger than you’re capable of.
Your words can’t hurt me anymore.
We only know each other through what we told.
Expose you me and the rest of the gang, run yourself dry, my disfigured twin-flame of worthlessness; no exaggeration,
You’re the meanest person I’ve ever known and it’s so funny when that spite isn’t aimed at you
But when it gets there you’re then such a pest; biting gum-deep into the skin then crying
to be left alone again, yet never letting go.
Remember when we spoke nonstop for several hours on call?
“Do you feel that glow?” Did you feel the hangover of us going passed our limits?
Was that all fake? Did you ever feel anything at all towards me or were you just that lonely?
I really hope I never know the answer, you make me sick as a person…
2.
Why should you go on killing yourself out there arguing with her on public facebook timelines? just killing yourself over and over to prove a point against someone
Who’s already long decided the audience’s verdict on you?
Our moods pendulum and swat up and down so sensitive who is who I regret every thing I ever told you, *****
I’m glad my face makes your stomach turn. You drag me outside just to spit at me in the crowd.
I’ve never made up after breaking up before, it became a daily occurrence for us two…
Or near enough…
O poor you two, what can I say?
Act your age and stop falling in love over the phone screen.
Your heart’s not broken, it’s just sick of being empty, I’m glad we got to know each other
Even if I’m worse off than when you first met me
O well, O ******* well, the saints too are calling in. It’s okay
If you cared more than your love did, at the end of the day dawn roosts
Waiting to swell the sky. In other words: it’s a chance encounter and familiar enough outcome that you really should be used to by now.
3.
I just wish it was me but it’s not and that’s okay too, I just kinda wish we got to meet
But god knows in the space of a week I’d seen enough of you, and you me.
I kinda miss you still, I’m in pieces, there will never be another like us
But I guess that was always just words to you,
and I’m weak as the ******;
But fate brought us to together to argue infitum, privately then on your digital stage, uglier and uglier until it has to end;
**** it; means nothing, I’ve become you a dozen times over, I can ignore you just as heartlessly.
You asked what’s the matter but you can’t handle being the problem, can you?
And in hindsight I was the problem more often than not, O well **** it; means nothing
I guess it never did to you after all, babe,
You live to hurt and I live for pain, babe.
How long did we have until too much was said?
I swear you loved half as intently as you hated, and babe, that’s really saying something.
For a second I got lost, I trusted you like a lover worth moving too fast for;
Everything I gave you is conscrewed or it’s the truth cropped and bare for the world to see. What else can I say or do other than make it clear that I’m speechless?
I’m so glad that we met and I’m so glad it’s over
I miss you so much and I’m so glad it’s over
In the end you hate me O well it’s over.
Rough draft, may delete or sharpen up later. Is this even poetry? Idk. Idc. I spoke to this woman for just over a month? And this feels like a nasty divorce. Some lines and a basic ‘structure’ figured out, picked at and shaped over the last few days. Crimson and clover/OVER AND OVER…
Ciao ciao.