I was nuzzled in her chest, crying, sorry for what had become of our relationship and for what ultimately ended it.
She rubbed my back
and consoled me a bit
and asked if I wanted something for the road.
I declined.
As I walked away into the afternoon light
to my car
I felt regret and a looming despair of which I was justified
in sensing since that night would become absolute hell.
hopelessness and pure self-pity
fractured self-esteem.
razor cuts and more tears, and wallowing in a melancholic feedback loop reminiscing of good times which really weren't all that good.

then I opened the app and I saw her holding hands with some
nerd,
posted just after I left - that was really ******.
I thought I was ******, I guess just slightly