I was turned on by a Toaster, she tanned my bread to gold In time she ejected me, it was her natural Toaster role... I fell for her sister, a Deep Fryer in despair, my lust began to boil I had to come up for some air... I ran off with a Can Opener, she could even sharpen knives, She opened up a can of *** whip, she could never be my wife! I met a **** Freezer, but her heart was cold as ice, I was bitten by her frosty ways Once bitten, never twice... I made my way across the tile to an Oven quite unique All her features were well displayed, on this EZ Baking Freak! She cooked me on the surface, yet burnt me deep within I guess my culinary skills were lacking in the end... So now I date a Spatula safely from the heat She flips a mean burger and french fries by the heap! Truth is I'm a Poet Who simply likes to eat!