you are no longer
a lump in my throat
but i still drown
in the waves of self-loathe
cause falling was never
part of the plan
but your presence shook
the grip of my hands

you were the vice
my mom warned me about
but your name will not be
traced in my mouth
cause you may taste
like wine on my tongue
but of all the things i like
wine was never one

so i'm finally going
to spew you out
i'll spew and spit
and puke out loud
you'll leave me like
you've never been here before
and i won't be dragged
back to you anymore