I want to keep my eyes clear so I can see the moon
I want to keep my eyes clear so my funeral won’t be an empty room
I want white around my pupils, meat between my bones and skin
And less green and purple patches from the bleeding within
I want clarity in my voice when my parents call
I want to be telling the truth behind the excuse that I didn’t mean to fall
I want the numbness to feel warmth, and my ears to stop ringing
I want to be sleeping every morning when the birds start singing
I want gentle love and passion from the man who has been my best friend
I want kept promises of our future, not threats of a near end
I want to stop talking in circles, never finishing a conversation
I want a life that has journeys but also has a destination
I need to keep my eyes clear, no high is worth chasing
I need to keep going even when all I can think about is escaping
These drugs will never love me back, they’d never chase me like I do them
Yet here I am begging for love to a man who makes me feel less than  
I’m tired of running after things that don’t even notice if I’m there
This life is so painful unforgiving and unfair