I **** my life away
A shaded newt
Hiding under the log
Of good fortune

I hope a witch comes by
And uses me
For a spell

I am utter ****.
But I glisten in the sunlight
Blondie never loved me
I was never truly gay.

My eyes are detachable
My flesh is a mere excuse
I can't grow a beard like Soupy
But I can't manage the noose

Maybe I'll just die
A sad and scared
And scattered man
Maybe I'll just die.

But I ain't got a plan.