I never thought I’d know the grief of
leaving
before I knew the grief of
gone

On nights like these, I feel
your head still in my lap,
or at least it where it
should be.

Your weight always warmed me,
and now I sleep
3 blankets heavy,
trying to replicate it.

Replace it, maybe,
against my better judgement.

My heart is part yours,
but so are my hands.
This new life I’m meant for
slips from my newly-atrophied fingers

I’ve started to grind my teeth
at night.

I wonder how long it’ll be
until I wear through the bone.

Twin flames burn bright,
then burn out.
If we were both one end of a candle,
now we’re clinging to the scraps of wax

I’m asking - Is it enough to say I miss you?
If there’s another word,
a stronger word,
I’d love to know it.

At 2am I text
“love u”

and hope you understand.