Feb 2020
Pieces of clothing scattered all over my bedroom floor,
This war with myself a war with many ******* casualties.
I’m going to hurt you like I always do so go get out the door,
Millions hurt and maybe someday soon there will be one dead.
Don’t know who’s going to win this war the monsters in my head,
Or will it be me but who is me no I just want to disappear and die.
But I’m too afraid of death no I’m just a coward no I am just a fool,
I wish I could just close my **** eyes and go to sleep for ******* ever.
I'm not your daughter no I'm not your daughter no I'm your wait...don't know who I am anymore,
Dig me a grave but do me a favor save your tears see sometimes I feel like I’m already gone.
And I cut all ties to all those who care or I hope and wish that they'll fix me some ******* how,
But maybe I'm just this way and maybe I'm not meant to be fixed and maybe I was born to go.
Yeah maybe I was born to want to die maybe I was born to live a lie maybe I’m afraid to try,
Maybe I’m scared of life and of death and maybe I’m just terrified of every single ******* thing.
I don’t want to be alive often wish that I was never born at all and all these things I’ll never say,
Don’t want you to see me in a different light and I don’t want to see your disappointed eyes.
I’m not your daughter no I’m not your ******* daughter no I’m your so—I’m someone else,
Don’t know if you know me you should but you don’t cause I’m hiding even from myself.
Meaningless I love you’s are mumbled cause I don’t know how that feels anymore I’m numb, Everyone else are living their lives and then there’s me and I don’t know what I’m doing ****!
You say that it’s a choice and you say that I should choose to live but what if I don’t want to,
What if I can’t choose and what if my mind and my body don’t agree on who I ******* am?!?
And what if I just feel ******* lost and dead and afraid emotions all over the ******* place,
Tell me how to control this black hole within taking all hopes and all dreams a ******* way?
This war with myself a war with many ******* casualties.
I’m going to hurt you like I always do so go get out the door,
Millions hurt and maybe someday soon there will be one dead.
Don’t know who’s going to win this war the monsters in my head,
Or will it be me but who is me no I just want to disappear and die.
But I’m too afraid of death no I’m just a coward no I am just a fool,
I wish I could just close my **** eyes and go to sleep for ******* ever.
I'm not your daughter no I'm not your daughter no I'm your wait...don't know who I am anymore,
Dig me a grave but do me a favor save your tears see sometimes I feel like I’m already gone.
And I cut all ties to all those who care or I hope and wish that they'll fix me some ******* how,
But maybe I'm just this way and maybe I'm not meant to be fixed and maybe I was born to go.
Yeah maybe I was born to want to die maybe I was born to live a lie maybe I’m afraid to try,
Maybe I’m scared of life and of death and maybe I’m just terrified of every single ******* thing.
I don’t want to be alive often wish that I was never born at all and all these things I’ll never say,
Don’t want you to see me in a different light and I don’t want to see your disappointed eyes.
I’m not your daughter no I’m not your ******* daughter no I’m your so—I’m someone else,
Don’t know if you know me you should but you don’t cause I’m hiding even from myself.
Meaningless I love you’s are mumbled cause I don’t know how that feels anymore I’m numb, Everyone else are living their lives and then there’s me and I don’t know what I’m doing ****!
You say that it’s a choice and you say that I should choose to live but what if I don’t want to,
What if I can’t choose and what if my mind and my body don’t agree on who I ******* am?!?
And what if I just feel ******* lost and dead and afraid emotions all over the ******* place,
Tell me how to control this black hole within taking all hopes and all dreams a ******* way?
