My thoughts are wiped away
Like crushed bugs by windshield wipers
That never had a chance at a full life
Wiper fluid cleansing the surface
Only to find itself ***** again

There’s a war going on inside of me
My heart and my head on two sides of the same coin
Neither willing to compromise
Sick of selling myself lies
That aren’t even believable anymore

I’m choking on pain
I’ve been ingrained to think that misery
Has a permanent home with me
As though it has hung up its clothes in my closet
Left a toothbrush on the bathroom sink
And a ***** glass on the countertop
I can’t stop thinking that she is my forever companion

They say that misery loves company
But I’m finding that solitude yields warmth
A cocoon of loneliness where I’m buried so deep
That no one else can see it
I just want someone else to see it

Too much pride to ask for help
Too independent to take it
I’m breaking
Hell, maybe I’m already broken
A mirror in sharp pieces
My reflection staring back blankly
As I try to glue myself back together

There’s a war going on inside of me
Choosing the better of two evils is impossible
This misery almost comical
As I try to claw it from my skin
Leaving only scars to remain
Lipstick stains on the glass in the kitchen
Hanging up a shirt to rid the wrinkles
My sweet misery’s toothbrush is still wet
With tears from last night’s battle with death
All reminders that my shadow is always there

The crushed bugs on my windshield a reminder
That death is inevitable
And life only measurable
By the number of breaths that we take
And not how many times the windshield wipers
Try to erase my journey