It always hits like a tidal wave, doesn't it?
The anxiety, the panic, the  t e r r o r.

I haven't met anyone that suffers from social anxiety as I do. My actions are always interpreted as they are on the surface. I think my friends have concluded that I'm naturally a *****.

Yes, I snapped at you because I'm nasty and have an awful temper. (I feel like you are trying to hurt me, you are trying to hurt me, please leave me alone)

Yes, I rolled my eyes because I'm inconsiderate. (Is this working? Do I look strong? Do I look like I'm relaxed and unbothered even though my heart might jump out of my chest?)

Yes, I just have a resting ***** face. (If I smile I'll look weird, and if I look weird people might do things to me, the might hurt me, they might hurt me like... like... he did)

If we tried to better understand our reasoning behind peoples actions, it helps us better understand ourself. It's why I'm so patient with my friends when they are breaking down, when they snap at me, ***** about me, trigger me. Because I know they are hurting too.

Or perhaps this is just naivety. That too.