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Jul 2019
I found a valley dark and red with blood.
Emotions bound inside released, a flood.

An intense craving for physical pain.
Is this the sign of someone who’s insane?

I’d drag a serrated edge on my skin.
Not resisting, I let the darkness in.

And afterwards I couldn’t get it out.
Reeling inside I’d scream and cry and shout.

It kept going, till it overtook me,
and it wasn’t going to let me be.

What scared me the most was wanting to stay,
and dwell in the darkness every day.

So then I felt like I had popped my top.
Truthfully, I didn’t want it to stop.

The pain had a way to make me alive,
but if I continued I’d not survive.

If I did more, and it was still going,
the scars on my legs would keep on growing.

Finally I was able to end it.
Others helping me get out of the pit.

It’s an ongoing and a constant fight.
Resisting the cravings every night.

So this poem I made for those of you,
who are like me, fighting this demon too.

You are not alone. It may feel that way.
If you’re suffering, don’t be scared to say.
Written by
Joshua Harestad
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