Another late night
Staring at my phone
I’m feeling so alone
I know I say that I have grown
But man I should have known
How that was a lie
Just like you and I
I don’t know why
I cannot empathize
With your feelings inside
What you are trying to hide
You say it’s over but I can’t cope
This just friends **** hurts the most
Yeah I know it was for the best, but it don’t
Feel like either of us is as happy as
We could be, just two of us having
What should be, reminiscent of
Couch conversations and quiet
Reservation, the chill down my spine
As you kissed me... ****
I miss the stupid things for sure
Like how ‘not enough’ you thought you were
But I would be the one to tell you first
There could be a million others and I’d still
Pick her.

****, what am I doing
Guard my heart, focus on healing,
Replace the loneliness with weight lifting
Maybe then I can feel something
Run miles on treadmills
Just to sprint away from the problems
‘Cuz overcomplications?
Man I don’t wanna solve em’
And if she ever wants to choose me for real?
Well I’ll open myself up and tell her how I feel

Till then it’s bottled up,
Tell myself to shut up
Wanna tell her all the things inside my head
Yeah she got me ****** up,
Just a few words a day ain’t really enough
I want long deep introspective
Followed up with romantic directive
Wish I could change my perspective
And see that she is protective
Of my innocent soul
And my fragile world
And let me tell you
She has the cutest baby girl
But I’m not the guy
To stop her crying at night
Make sure those laces are tight
Tell her that she’s strong and
To stand up and fight.

Instead I’m the one on the sidelines
Just warming the bench
Tear ducts are dry
Think I’m all but spent
I get to watch as some guy who dipped when the going got tough
Come back like its all good,
He’ll probably split when it’s rough.
But I can’t really judge,
Cause I don’t know him all that well
Just the little bits and pieces
You had decided to tell
I really don’t want to watch this blow up
And turn to smoke
Leave you feeling worthless
Like you’re the broken joke
The pitiless punchline
Battered, bruised over time
Stuck in this revolving half-love
Paradigm.

I wonder if she knows that i will always ******* care, about the way she holds herself, the way she braids her hair, I thought someone who sticks around was pretty rare, people come and go, trust me I’ve been there. So I don’t feel hurt at all that you apprehensive to a fault, throw all your feelings locked away inside a vault, but I’m finessing the tellers to help me get inside, to see the truth of where all of your reasonings reside.