i cry after i *** now
and when i smell make up wipes
or look through your likes

someone tried to give me
advice
the other day

they said
i should find a new hobby
something that i didn’t do before
or during you

so i started planting flowers
and i find it very interesting to watch them grow
i sit outside and cry next to the ones that don’t

i bury fallen petals into soil
to decompose and seep
into the roots to replenish others

i find myself posting their colors
and their growth
online
for everyone to see

including you
i always check if you’ve seen
i guess that defeats the purpose of my hobby